Stealing a page from Victor Cruz.
Posted on 07/02/2014 9:55:48 AM PDT by PoloSec
Try playing on sand. :-)
-PJ
And the rink is ICE! Thank you for this, btw. I had a nice debate with a Scot on this very subject the other day; and, I was trying to convey my feeling of being forced (as you pointed out) to like this game, to watch this game. We did a back and forth and agreed to disagree (he doesn't see the appeal of baseball). However, some soccer nut had to post to me that I "LITERALLY" don't know anything about this game. I guess that meant I could not give my opinion on why I don't watch this incrediably boring game.
I thought about that, and I was reminded of the fact that every four years I get hooked by curling. I will even watch curling when the USA is not playing. I don't know why. I find it somehow, mesmerizing. Now, I actually don't know anything about curling. It's big in Europe and Canada; but, after watching for several Winter Olympics, I don't think I could actually explain how they do the scoring. But, I watch, and I enjoy the thing. Soccer simply doesn't "draw" me in. For some reason, curling does. And, being in the Seattle area, I get the CBC - Canadian channel; and, occasionally I will watch the Equestrian events. So, I will watch different types of "sporting" events; but, they need to have a certain something, that is hard to define, which will draw me in. Soccer fails.
Thanks for the credit.
Alternative shoot-out approach: follow the format of the NHL (three shooters from each team, alternating as in hockey, with additional shooters as needed until the tie is broken) - but with one key modification: the shooter gets the ball at mid-field, the defending team gets a defender at the top of the box, along with the goalie. Once the ball is touched by the shooter, but not before, the defender can move. Defending team must alternate defenders in the same fashion that the offensive team alternates shooters (no repeats until you’ve gone through the entire roster, unlike the goofy Olympic-TJOshie-against-the-world rules).
Two other major modifications:
Get rid of the stupid yellow card (no immediate consequences) / red card (death penalty) system, and replace with a penalty box (minors, majors, and game misconducts) as per hockey.
Allow (hell, encourage) the use of the arms to advance the ball or propel shots on goal. No carrying or trapping with the hands or arms allowed - those would result in lost of possession - but thwacking the ball to advance it, pass it or shoot it would be perfectly fine.
Soccer is only the world’s most popular game because it’s the world cheapest game (you’re not going to be able to outfit a football team in a village in Zambia), not because it’s the world’s most exciting game. American has a history of taking crappy sports and making them interesting (see: cricket, rugby (although I wouldn’t say that to the face of a rugby player)) and making them into sports worth watching - we should take it as a national mission to do that to soccer.
Only in soccer can a player bite another and keep his teeth.
“As an example, one or two slam-dunks might be palatable, however as a steady a diet is just about as interesting as stuffing a shopping bag at the market.”
You mean the chest pounding displays after dunking isn’t exciting to you?! The best is when a near 7 footer dunks with no one within 20 feet of him, and still breaks out the primal screams and chest poundage. But at least they usually can’t spend too much time on the fruity celebration, the ball is going up court right after. In Soccer the crazy celebrations by players after scoring a goal is way too much for me, but at least it doesn’t happen 40 times a game.
The absolute worst is the NFL, they break out the fruity self-congratulatory gyrating displays after even mundane plays. The cool NFL players have no way to self police the jerkwads, the nature of the modern game doesn’t allow it.
FReegards
Two points: 1. No one is forcing you to watch. Seriously, are you under duress? 2. If you admit that you don’t watch, why do you think your opinion is equal to that of someone who does? I mean, that’s common sense . . . I don’t watch cricket, and don’t presume to tell others what I think about it.
Ever watch a baseball fight? LOL
Actually, the soccer goal is 8’ high by 24’ (8 yds) wide – a ratio of 1:3 … An increase in height by a foot to an even 3 yards would probably marginally increase goal production. It would be a interesting exercise to find out too why the other standard dimensions are set as they are, e.g. why it’s a 6-yard box in front of the goal, and an 18-yard deep Penalty area instead of 20 yards with the PK spot right in the center.
Curious though that with all this talk of forced “metrification”, the standard dimensions are all expressed in exact old-fashioned English units ;)
This was a boring article about the boringness of soccer.
American sports are civilized.
Soccer is more primitive in rules and in fan base.
Soccer became popular as a vehicle for drunken behavior and fighting. Hooliganism.
Even today that is largely the case.
Stealing a page from Victor Cruz.
I've given up on the NFL too. But my response to the prancing is that the league should institute a new major award, "The Jolson," for the best impersonation of a minstrel show strut by an player. To really do it right, the award should be presented live on national tv, when they hand out the MVP award. The top contenders would reprise their routines, and the white guys would wear blackface and the black guys would wear whiteface, just to honor the spirit of the thing.
I used to wonder where all the strutting, chest pounding, and prancing came from. Then I became a parent, and had a three year old. Fortunately, my three year old outgrew such displays.
I remember in 94 a South American player accidentally knocked the ball in to his own team’s goal.
His team was eliminated.
Back in his home country, before the World Cup was over, this player was shot death at a street cafe with the shooters yelling, “goal” each time they shot him.
I thought the US, who hosted the thing that year, should have cancelled it and made everyone go home after that.
The World Cup and pro soccer in general is not something to be admired or interested in.
It does serve as a marker of sorts. The more interest there is in it here in the US, the closer we go to a European Style socialist state.
Oh, please.
It’s true.
It’s not the cause, just a barometer.
I can just imagine these people wheeling their carts past the ethnic food section of their local grocery store, white-knuckled and gnashing their teeth. LOL
Did it ever occur to you that perhaps USMNT matches are one of the few bastions left where people can proudly wave the Red, White and Blue?
And there’s also more than one Gadsden Flag in the crowd.
Yeah, I don’t like that kind of thing until the game is decided. I mean come on, we know you are enjoying what you are doing, but until the end of the match let the fans do your celebrating.
Freegards
I believe your shootout scheme is very similar to something the old NASL tried in the 1970’s as a tiebreaker – that was still a one-on-one with the goalkeeper, but the attempt started at the 35-yard line (which they put in to replace the centerline for offsides) and the players had 5 seconds to shoot the ball. I recall a lot of them would toe-lift the ball immediately & dribble the ball in the air on the way in to get the goalie to commit.
The problem with the penalty box approach is that 11 vs 10 for short spurts really isn’t all that much of an advantage, unlike in hockey where 5-on-4 is a big advantage.
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