The woman sounds like a Catholic
Catholics like me, believe that death is between them and God, that you are supposed to live this life (hellish as it may be) not kill yourself.
The narcotic pain meds can be a surreptitious means of death by overdose. “nursing” homes are evil in many cases. Leaving patients in their own mess, placing food trays out of their reach, the people that work there develop a sick sense of their power of life and death over their patients. Additionally they are ridiculously expensive.
Keep the poor woman at home, don’t warehouse her in the blind belief the “nursing home” would give better care than you at home. It is just a job to them and they don’t love her. She could go for weeks without seeing anyone who loves her in a warehouse like that.
I second everything you said! From personal experience, pain meds scripts are written with a WIDE “as needed” dosage. Even in my mom’s last hours at home, we wound up with a hospice nurse determined that SHE would see Mom leave us. Thankfully, when I called to get more meds, the nurse on the other end questioned the need for more morphine. Thankfully, the nurse whose shift was ending shared what the evil nurse told her and evil nurse was outta there in less than two hours on a holiday. Mom did leave us the next morning - when God called her.
Um, a strong desire to live at any age is not exclusively Catholic. I am a Baptist and would take the same position. As an attorney, I also encourage others who are staunchly prolife to have their living wills written to incorporate their prolife beliefs. It's actually fairly involved, lots of things you might not think of, but it can be set up in advance, while you're still independent.