Wait, HAARP isn’t a weather control device?
Dude, what about the chemtrails man?
HAARP is responsible, according to multiple sources, for:
Katrina;
9-11;
the Oklahoma tornadoes;
the Fukushima tsunami;
the Chelyabinsk meteor strike;
the Southern Lights (opposite of the Northern Lights, these are fuschia);
random acts of silliness;
male pattern baldness;
halitosis of the liver;
Chevy Volts exploding;
my teen daughter’s mood swings;
AND
the increased dividends of aluminum futures (lots of tinfoil required)...