Thank you for clarifying your thinking. It is all perfectly reasonable, as I see it. You are also right that no one can sell God to another who has no interest in the subject.
In my early thinking on the subject I concluded that unless a person is perfectly content with there being no God and that when we die that is the end, period, that person has a difficult time reaching a sincere and honest belief. Otherwise, the fear of death, that most basic thing which our DNA imbues us with (fear) and instructs us to avoid (death), will encourage us toward a belief because we want it to be true rather than really believing it. I imagine you are content with death. That is what our observations and reasoning would tell us. I also imagine that you are honestly not concerned with alternatives.
For me, belief also has many practical benefits. Believing that God has a plan for my life is comforting and it encourages positive thinking. Believing that I have been forgiven for my sins eliminates guilt and depression and encourages and strengthens me to continually seek the ideal. Loving God and my fellow man feels good and it energizes me. Giving thanks and praise instead of asking for things and seeking my selfish desires also has a salutary effect. In short, most of my human foibles and the problems I face are addressed by Christianity and that helps me lead a more satisfying life.
Perhaps you do the same with mental discipline and understanding and perhaps I could have, too, but frankly, this is easier and I have more trust in it. There are also the feelings that occur within me that I cannot explain nor easily describe, things like the smile that comes to my face when prayers seem to have been answered; simple ambient moods and feelings of goodwill; peace for no reason; and more. Those I doubt I could achieve on my own.
This exchange has been enjoyable.
Yes. I'm in no hurry, but I've thought about it all my life. They say that when you're young, you don't, but it varies from person to person. I remember being very young (as in, so short my feet were only about three feet away) and knowing I would die someday.
I also imagine that you are honestly not concerned with alternatives.
I'm really not. A big event for me was having surgery when I was about 32. They put the mask over my face and told me to count backwards... a few seconds later, they were calling my name to wake me up. I woke up and thought "What's wrong, why are they stopping?" But of course, they weren't stopping; they were finished. It was three hours later. During that three hours, I did not exist, as far as I can tell. It wasn't like sleep. It wasn't even darkness. That was time that I did not exist. I pondered it for a very long time. I realized that before I was born, I also did not exist. And I rarely quote sages, books, or movies, but there's one line from The Matrix I do find true: Everything that has a beginning, has an end. Including us. It's hard to conceive, I know. But there you have it.
For me, belief also has many practical benefits. Believing that God has a plan for my life is comforting and it encourages positive thinking. Believing that I have been forgiven for my sins eliminates guilt and depression and encourages and strengthens me to continually seek the ideal. Loving God and my fellow man feels good and it energizes me. Giving thanks and praise instead of asking for things and seeking my selfish desires also has a salutary effect. In short, most of my human foibles and the problems I face are addressed by Christianity and that helps me lead a more satisfying life.
Again, I really think personality type plays into this a lot. For instance: I'm simply not prone to depression or lethargy. I'm one of these who always has projects they are interested in, ideas to put into action, something to research, something to collect, a list of things to accomplish, and I buzz around like a quiet, busy, introverted little squirrel whose only real issues are "don't-get-hit-by-car" and "where'd-I-put-those-nuts." I'm also very good at bucking myself up if I am at all down. My favorite way to wait for the bus to work in the morning is to play "30 Things I'm Glad About" and make a list. Anything I'm glad about that morning (good hair day... my cats are happy... my step-dad recovered from surgery... it's not Monday... nice weather out... house is clean...)
I also have very little guilt about anything I've done in my life. There are some mistakes, but I look back and think that I acted as reasonably as I could at the time, given what little I knew. I can only think of one incident I feel really horrible about. I've apologized to the person I hurt, but I'll never really stop feeling guilty about it. And honestly, I don't think I SHOULD stop. I mean, I don't dwell on it, but it's definitely a don't-ever-do-THAT-again sort of blemish. My only other painful memories are more about embarrassing social gaffes I've made over the years (oh, thousands.)
Again, I think it's a personality type. To be honest, I really do operate like a very articulate and organized animal. I don't have a spiritual side at all. I like to figure things out, I like to do things, and I have a few emotions, but I truly suspect I don't have as many as most people, and the ones I have are not complex. Things that people say often baffle me (like "there's a thin line between love and hate." Say what??? That's nuts.) My friends often chide me by saying that I see everything in black and white, and no shades of gray. They're right, too. I ain't into gray, baby. It's black or white, and life is simple. But this isn't a stance I created to infuriate Christians on Free Republic. It really is just my personality and always has been. Even my mother thinks I'm a bit odd.