Just speak Spanish w/a Puerto Rican accent, and you will alienate everyone. Trust me on this one.
That is SOOO weird. Just the other day we come home from shopping and there is this lesbian puerto rican sitting at my computer. I says hey! who left the door unlocked? a f****** lesbian puerto rican sneaked in while we was gone and is using MY f****** computer! She says F*** You, DAD...