The Coupon Whisperer: "Extreme Couponing" Returning as a Series to TLC Next Week

Early this AM I had a very STRANGE (mis)adventure. I was on my way to my secret coupon stash. I awoke at 4 AM and guzzled down cup after cup of coffee to wake up. I was on the road by a little after 5 AM and about 5:30 AM I had the urge to purge myself of my coffee if you know what I mean. Anyway, I figured I could hold it in but a few minutes later another, stronger urge, which I also held in. However, a few minutes after that alarm bells started going off in my head. Something like: "YOU NOW HAVE ONE MINUTE TO UNCONTROLLABLE URINATION!"

Well, it was still pitch black outside so I looked and saw a dark alley behind some stores. Sooooo...I drove to the alley, looked around, and saw the coast was clear. I was doing my thing for a few seconds when suddenly the dark ally was pierced by a pair of headlights. Another car was coming in my direction in the alley. I figured he would respect a certain unspoken universal code of etiquette and continue on his way. Unfortunately he began slowing down and headed directly at me and stopped just feet away.

"Uh-Oh!" I was thinking. "This is either a cop or some code enforcement guy or...a pervert."

I couldn't stop the flow of the recycled coffee so continued with what I was doing while staring very warily at the car door which opened. Out stepped some guy with a white shirt and tie. He walked right up to me (as I continued my imperative activity) and said: "Sir, I work with a number of business men and..."

So right here I figured he would read me the riot act about "desecrating" the alley behind his business. However, he continued, "I thought I might share this with you."

He shoves a copy of the "Watchtower" in front of me.

I was flabbergasted. The Jehova's Witnesses are so desperate to get your attention that they would actually interrupt you in the midst of a vital bodily function and use that opportunity to hit you with their propaganda. Anyway, I was somewhat relieved (pun intended) that it wasn't a cop or some zoning guy getting on my case so I politely just lied and said we already have that copy of the "Watchtower" at home. Actually I think we had it at home for about 5 seconds until I dumped it (we get the Witnesses knocking our door constantly because my clueless wife once actually got into an extended conversation with them).

But how astounding was that? A JW who violates a big taboo to shove literature in front of someone in a dark alley who is relieving himself.

OMG, I don’t know whether to laugh or be angry over the offense!

(You shoulda ‘expressed’ your startlement on his shoes. Or close enough to it that he felt the threat.)

JWs are a persistent bunch, but that guy takes the cake!

You MAY be able to cut down on the JW knocks by mailing a cease-and-desist letter to their temple. No need to incur the expense of a lawyer. Just use the magic C&D phrase and also invoke your “right to the enjoyment of the peace of your property/domicile,” and you should be left alone for a few years. Undoubtedly they’ll test you, so remind them of the letter & refuse to be drawn into conversation. (Looks like it’ll be easier for you than for your wife!)

I work nights & have done so for most of the last 21 years. If I hadn’t learned how to keep solicitors at bay I’d be in prison by now.

We had NO coupons in this week’s fish wrapper...Monday is MLK day and our fish wrapper NEVER has coupons on a holiday weekend.

Understand the health issues...same here. Was supposed to have a nerve block this afternoon...but because I accidentally checked the Latex box, while I was under the influence of loretabs/ anti-puke med and pain level out the roof, the surgery center is INSISTING on a needless RAST allergy test. It would mean coming off my clarititn for 2 weeks...this is ‘my’ Peak allergy season. Even offered to sign a waiver...no budging the by the book ‘coordinator’. Even hubby couldn’t get her to budge, so I said very loudly, very un lady like to cancel the R’n thing. Left a complaint with my doc’s nurse. Still waiting to hear back from them...they were suppose to call yesterday.

I have bone on bone in the C-4-7, and it is affecting my entire right arm, with loss of fine motor skills in right hand...and you guessed it I’m right handed.

The” where is my coupons” lady is going to be on TLC

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IO-mj8Kh4o4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9367HbaJhE

When my $1.50 Colgate coupons did not make it to me in time for the WAGS friends and family day because the seller screwed up...I SHOUTED after going to my mailbox

“WHERE IS MY COUPONS!”

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.