I have wondered about the gay sounding voices. One of the gay men I worked with escaped my gaydar for some time. He was not ‘the Marlboro Man’ but he was not effeminate by any means. Finally he traveled with his boyfriend and another female friend of mine. She was shocked to report that our tall, masculine friend spoke with a feminized voice and a LISP around his boyfriend. He also portrayed himself as unable to reach something on a kitchen shelf so his boyfriend would do it for him. So for him, it was a coy affectation but I don’t think it is necessarily so for others.
What also makes me cringe about this is that sometimes I get the feeling these gay men have very very very LOW opinions of women - even though they emulate us - in that they see us a caricatures, feeble and ‘less-than’, possibly pretending at femininity, using ‘wiles’ to get a man to reach something on a shelf or almost to the extent that our voices (like everything about us) are affectations too (as if, in reality, our voices resonate like line backers?)