So I guess carrying my son for 40 weeks, giving birth to him with no drugs, and then nursing him for 18 months was nothing. Not to mention all of the home-made babyfood. Nope, no store bought, pre-fab food for my son. I won’t argue that a father is essential, but to say that one parent is more important than the other is a little skewed. Maybe I’m just being an over-emotional, coddling mommy.
What you said. Great truth-filled article, but the first paragraph is just plain wrong.
I think this article is referring to the spiritual leadership in a family, and God has placed that responsibility on the father. Mothers have equally valuable roles, just different.
As a mother of young children, who does many of the same things you did :), I often look to families with older/adult children to see what they have done in raising them. What I have seen over and over in the past decade is that those whose children have rebelled or rejected their faith, have been homes in which the mother was the spiritual leader of the home. Now if I can just convince my husband!!
I am a mother, did much of the same things you did, breast fed both kids until the age of two. They never had a bottle, never ate commercial baby food and never attended day care or pre-school. I was able to do all of this because I their father brought home the bacon. He understood that children need their mother and fully supported my stay at home status.
With all that being said. Just look at what has happened to the last two generations of children since fatherhood has been jettisoned by society. This chaos is not caused by the absence of mothers.
Trust in the Lord in all things. He says fathers are the bedrock of the family and they are. Children need them and truth be told, so do mothers.
CM
A mother of two
My wife would agree with you. I think nurturing is a team effort, but the mother-child bond is something a father will never approach.
My sons are the embodiment of rough-and-tumble boys -Trucks, toy soldiers, legos, scraped knees, and wrestling. But they still run to momma when they have a boo-boo. They wrestle with me every night but they still want mom to rub their backs and sing to them when it’s bed time...If they could only stay at age 4 and 5 a bit longer...
As far as the religious aspect goes...Not necessary to raise a child correctly. I’ll teach them their moral values. I’ll also teach them to think independently and to make up their own minds about god/religion.
I’m as pro-life as they come and never went to church outside of a wedding and funeral here and there.
I’ll teach my boys all the life skills they need - reading, writing, shooting, hunting, physical fitness - all the things I’ve learned as a career military officer. Mom will teach them higher math, music, more reading etc.
We both are responsible for their moral fiber, their sense of right and wrong, the importance of keeping their word, work ethic, etc.
While I respect people’s religious beliefs, it’s just not my cup of tea.
Now now.
Jealousy is unbecoming mothers.
The vast majority of the worst of REACTIVE ATTACHMENT DISORDERS are caused, imho, by
poor/non-existent fathering.
Mother’s love is virtually always there for even some pretty flawed mothers—to some degree or another.
Sure plenty of awful mothers cause a lot of RAD as well.
However, the sense of self-worth, self-confidence etc. etc. seems to be mostly fostered or lastingly enhanced in durable ways by fathers . . . or not.
Fathers have a masculine way of holding kids to a higher standard to reach for—the best of them—while lovingly supporting that reach without doing it for the kid and without smothering the kid or overwhelming them with obsessive compulsive horrors.
Mothers tend to be first in kids hearts in a list of ways.
However, Daddy’s love is POWERFULLY special—when it’s there—and devastating when it’s not.
WOW, what an emotionally overwrought response.
>>> So I guess carrying my son for 40 weeks,
So are you saying you viewed this as an imposition of your son on you?
>>> ... giving birth to him
thank goodness you did give birth to him and didn’t exercise your right to tear him limb from limb.
>>> ... with no drugs,
you want brownie points for that?
>>> ... and then nursing him for 18 months was nothing.
bully for you.
>>> ... Not to mention all of the home-made babyfood.
ya could have BOUGHT the (bleeping) food.
>>> ... Nope, no store bought, pre-fab food for my son.
yes, you could have.
>>> ... I won’t argue that a father is essential,
WELL, THAT IS ONE GOOD POINT.
MORE THAN MOST FEMINISTS WOULD GIVE.
They are still looking for their fish riding bicycles.
>>> ... but to say that one parent is more important than the other
The feminists have been saying that for years.
That is why the country is in the trouble it is in.
That is why there are SO MANY single mothers.
>>> ... is a little skewed.
>>> ... Maybe I’m just being an over-emotional, coddling mommy.
YES, JUST A LITTLE BIT.