I broke some contract? Then he can see me in small claims.
Look, it's not like I don't tip, I do. But I tip for service and good work, not because some snarky waiter demands it. In Canada, you see, waiters already are at minimum wage - often above - so it's much less of an issue. That may be why your experience with Canadians was as bad tippers. They don't see how little American wait staff are paid. I do see it, and I tip well in the USA especially. But not if the server are obnoxious jerks as they too often are.
If you have bad service, by all means tip poorly or not at all. But be very sure to speak to a manager (or owner if possible) and tell them precisely what you didn’t like about the service.
A bad waiter hurts their business and the other wait staff’s income. No one in the restaurant is sad to see a bad waiter leave.
I like how you laugh off your own provincialism by trying to make fun of what I said.