Sorry, I can’t resist posting some hilarious comments from Denninger’s Ticker forum.
Just came across Bloomberg:
* SOMALI PIRATE CAPTAIN DEMANDS ACCESS TO TARP, PPIP
* ACCUSES US OF FAVORING US, EURO-BASED PIRATES
* SOMALI PIRATES THREATEN DEPRESSION IF DEMANDS NOT MET
* RECAPITALIZATION NEEDED “TO GET BOOTY FLOWING AGAIN”
* PIRATES SUBMIT $50B LEVEL 3 SEAWEED ASSETS TO TALF
* SOMALI PIRATES ISSUE $25B FDIC-BACKED DEBT
* TRADER BUZZ: PIRATES PLANNING TO SUBMIT STOLEN TRASH TO PPIP
* SOMALI PIRATES PASS US TREASURY STRESS TEST
* STRESS TEST REVEALS SOMALI PIRATES MAY WANT MORE BOOTY
* SOMALI PIRATES PREANNOUNCE RECORD Q1 PROFIT
* MARKETS RALLY ON RISING PIRATE SECTOR PROFITS
* SOMALI PIRATES TO REPAY TARP FUNDS, SAY THEY ARE “WELL CAPITALIZED”
*SOMALI PIRATES APPLY TO BECOME BANK TO ACCESS TARP
*PAULSON: TARP PIRATE EQUITY IS AN `INVESTMENT,’ WILL PAY OFF
*KASHKARI SAYS `SOMALI PIRATES ARE ‘FUNDAMENTALLY SOUND’ ‘
*HUD SAYS SOMALI DHOW FORECLOSURE PROGRAM HAD `VERY LOW’ PARTICIPATION
*SOMALI PIRATES IN DISCUSSION TO ACQUIRE CITIBANK
*FED OFFICIALS: AGGRESSIVE EASING WOULD CUT SOMALI PIRATE RISK
*FED AGREED OCT. 29 TO TAKE `WHATEVER STEPS’ NEEDED FOR SOMALI PIRATES
SOMALI PIRATES UNION (SPU) THREATENS TO BEGIN BUILDING AUTOMOBILES UNLESS TARP FUNDS RELEASED IMMEDIATELY.
TREASURY SHOULD HELP SOMALI PIRATES WHO LOSE THEIR BOATS: BARNEY FRANK
SOMALI PIRATES AIMS MERGER WITH GOLDMAN SACHS TO BECOME “TOO BIG TO JAIL”
SOMALI PIRATES TO USE SWAG, PIECES O’ EIGHT AS COLLATERAL IN FEDS LENDING FACILITY
PORK SEC. 317. SEVEN-YEAR COST RECOVERY PERIOD FOR SOMALI MOTORSPORTS RACING TRACK FACILITY
SOMALI PIRATE LEADER SAYS PIRATING AN ‘ESSENTIAL PART OF THE GLOBAL ECONOMY FOR 500 YEARS’; SAILS TO D.C. IN PRIVATE YACHT TO BEG FOR BAILOUT
SOMALI PIRATES MUTINY OVER DECISION TO INVEST GOLD BARS IN LAS VEGAS CONDO HOTELS.
RANSOM MARKET IS OVERSOLD, SAYS SOMALI BLOGGER
SOMALI PIRATES VISITING DC SHOULD GET BAILOUT: SEN REID
SOMALI & PIRATES 500 INDEX IS LOSING ITS HEAD AND SHOULDERS