DUmmie FUnnies 09-23-08 (DUmmie Drops Political Note Into Church Collection Basket)

DUmmie FUnnies ^ | September 23, 2008 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

[txroadkill]

Actually, I'm a Luciferian Satanist...

I hate those guys, they are so self rightious, they think they are the only ones going to Hell.

[PJ-Comix]

Speaking of food...I scored BIG at my secret market today. I bought 5 large Red Baron Delux pizzas for just 99 cents each!!! Also I picked up a 2.21 lb slab of baby back ribs for just $3.59. Last week I got two really large slabs of beef ribs for just $1.50 each. I usually don’t like beef ribs but these were terrific. BEST beef ribs I’ve ever eaten!

[visualops]

If his mother is 89, he’s hardly a kid. In fact, that makes him likely part of the tail end of the boomers. A middle aged sourpuss who doesn’t even get that a church has every right, an obligation even, to instruct the parishioners on how to vote in accordance to church teachings to avoid sin.
Probably mad he had to drive his mom instead of doing whatever and so takes it out on the church.

[HangThemHigh]

"... For now, we have decided to donate all the money we would have donated to (-name of church-) in the next 2 months to the No on 8 campaign, to reflect our support of same-sex marriage. After that, we will permanently donate all money that we would have donated to the Mission to Planned Parenthood instead. (-name of church-) will not get any of our money, ever again.

Translation: Dummy pocketed mom's donation and will spend it on gay hookers.

[Paul Heinzman]

Oboy! this one is gonna be FUn!

[Paul Heinzman]

I dropped this note into the collection basket at my Mom's church today

Did it say "Thank you, Lord for thinkin' bout me/I'm alive and doin' fine?" Cause I think that would have been nice.

[Paul Heinzman]

"You do not have the right to make political statements during the Mass. A major tenet of the United States Constitution is separation of church and state, and you have crossed that clearly defined boundary of separation. Your tax-exempt status is at risk. The church does not have the right to tell parishoners how to vote, or even what criteria to use when voting. This is not the first time this has happened at (-name of church-) If this continues, you will be facing a lawsuit challenging your tax-exempt status. For now, we have decided to donate all the money we would have donated to (-name of church-) in the next 2 months to the No on 8 campaign, to reflect our support of same-sex marriage. After that, we will permanently donate all money that we would have donated to the Mission to Planned Parenthood instead. (-name of church-) will not get any of our money, ever again.

That isn't anything like that song. That isn't even nice at all.

[Paul Heinzman]

Actually, I'm a Luciferian Satanist

Oh great, here we go. Just we need--some high and mighty Luciferian Satanist looking down his nose on all the Wiccans, Pagans and Misanthropic Satanists with his self-unrighteous ways.

[Paul Heinzman]

I'm just taking my Mom because she's 89 and can't make it there on my own.

How compassionate. Take your feeble old mother to church and embarrass her at the time of her life when her faith is her only strength. You're just a peach, aren't you.

Boy-o-boy, I though Xemasab was an ungrateful child.

[Paul Heinzman]

Thanks for the offer, but I don't believe in any religion. In fact I belive that God hates religion. I only take my 89-year-old Mom to church because she can't get there otherwise.

So you couldn't help her to the pew and then walk down the street to Starbucks and post your hate on DU while enjoying a latté until services were over? No, you just have to stand out, don't you? "Dig how hip I am, Father, I dropped a nasty gram in your collection plate! Look at MEEEE!"

[Paul Heinzman]

No sensible lawyer is going to take up a case that's suing a church for attempting to politically persuade its congregation.

But John Edwards will.

[Paul Heinzman]

I hate those guys, they are so self rightious, they think they are the only ones going to Hell.

GMTA. My post 68 is along that theme, but yours is FUnnier.

[Paul Heinzman]

LOL. I was thinking I wish the IRS had a little more “forgive and forget” attitude, but it’d probably be bad for business.

[Paul Heinzman]

A major tenet of the United States Constitution is separation of church and state, and you have crossed that clearly defined boundary of separation.

Even if you stretch the First Amendment to that length, it is still designed to keep government out of religion, not vice versa.

If you were that stupid in reading, writing or arithmetic, I'd tell you to go back to school, but since school is probably where you picked up that drivel, I'll just tell you to STFU.

[Paul Heinzman]

Don't forget to sue all the churches that teach the social gospel or liberation theology or invite Dems to speak etc

You just don't get it, do you?

[Paul Heinzman]

The one old priest that was making political comments last February right before the presidential primary here in California was back again. I dropped a similar note in the basket last February. Then a few weeks ago he was there again. He prefaced his comments with "Now, I may get in trouble for this, but..." and there were a few scattered giggles. Then he started talking about the recent Saddleback thing where that pastor interviewed McCain and Obama separately. So maybe that "I may get in trouble" comment was a result of someone telling all the priests to not make political remarks, maybe not. I don't know and I have no way of knowing.

The "I may get in trouble" line was a joke. He probably made an example out of you stupid note when you weren't there. Those folks weren't giggling with you, they were giggling AT you.

You're not just a butt, you're the butt of the joke.

[Lady Heron]

Actually, I'm a Luciferian Satanist

I always knew you were the evil party, thanks for the proof.

The idiot says that like he is proud of it. Try leaving that faith, odds aren't in your favor.

[Roscoe Karns]

Why leave a note? Since he was already in the church why not confront the Rev. face to face? Coward.

[Paul Heinzman]

Frank, the DUmmies just moved my cheese. I went over there and they now have little buttons next to their posts that say things like "Must Read" and "Recommended."

Skinner keeps making our job easier and easier.

[Charles Henrickson]

"You do not have the right to make political statements during the Mass. . . . For now, we have decided to donate . . . to the No on 8 campaign, to reflect our support of same-sex marriage. After that, we will permanently donate all money . . . to Planned Parenthood. . . ."

I infer that the preacher mentioned the sins of homosexuality and abortion. The DUmmie thinks these are "political statements." Well, DUmmie, they are first of all MORAL statements, in accord with GOD'S Law.