In the lyric booklet the came with the DKs “Give Me Convenience or Give Me Death” there’s a page for the song
“Too Drunk to F-—” and it includes a fake 45 cover:
“TED Kennedy’s Too Drunk To Swim, b/w PRAY, Mary Jo!
Available at Hall of Records, Chappaquiddick, Mass.”
Bingo! I couldn’t remember the details but vaguely remembered something in reference to Chappaquidick [sp] being included. I just assumed that if Savage were to play any DK’s for Teddy it would start with “Went to a party, the other night, had sixteen beers...” and contained an admonition to put your retainer in your purse...