Posted on 03/19/2007 5:54:23 PM PDT by Keli Kilohana
There are 2.5 grams of CO2 dissolved in each 16oz. bottle of soft drink. The average American drinks 43 gallons of soda pop a year. Therefore, every American releases over 400 grams of CO2 annually!
Multiply that by 250 million Americans and we are talking a Hurricane Katrina of CO2 being released by Americans every year by flatus and belched gas!
Al Gore has invented the carbon offset CO2 capture kit. Basically, each plastic bottle will come with a one way enema tip. When one empties one’s soda pop, he or she will immediately place the tip on the empty container. When one feels the need to belch one simply expels this burst of CO2 safely into the bottle by mouth through the tip. Then later, as the harmful gas is to be passed in private as flatus, one inserts the tip in one’s rectum and catches the remainder of the CO2, then tosses the bottle—with tip intact--in the garbage where it will be safely taken to a landfill and buried.
For each CO2 capture bottle used in this manner, one earns one carbon credit good for using up to twenty times the electricity used by the average American.
Uh Oh!
Fortunately many Conservative Diet Coke-aholics don't suffer Al's faux guilt over bogus man-made global warming.
Hey, great idea, as long as it's "for the polar bears" I'm sure that Albore and leftists everywhere will be eager to inconvenience themselves a bit.....
All carbon emissions would halt immediately if Gore would just close his mouth. ;)
43 gallons. I don't drink any sody pop. Ya'll must chuggin it down to make the average 43.
How very true! ~P~
The problem is with Big Soda. Ban it!
Do I need a sarcasm tag?
Big Soda? Do you mean Halliburpon?
I have done my part to warm the planet ...burp
Laugh now, but it won't be 6-months before some idiot liberal insists on "reduced CO2 soda".+
Sounds like Detective Harris from Barney Miller was right to invest in Zinc, after all.
Good one!
ping
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