"I proceeded to cry for half an hour, eat an entire tub of Cookies and Cream ice cream and then lie on the couch watching Oprah re-runs until I eventually fell asleep."
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A bullet's quicker. |
Posted on 04/11/2006 6:59:50 AM PDT by Millee
Whether you've dated a friend's ex, or experienced the agony of having a friend date one of yours, many describe it as playing with fire. So is there ever a time when it's acceptable to date a friend's old flame?
"I once had a friend date my ex," snarls Jodi P., a successful thirty-something marketing manager. "We had recently broken up and I had no idea about it until she rang me up to gloat about it the following week. Of course I told her I was fine with it, but as I hung up the phone, I proceeded to cry for half an hour, eat an entire tub of Cookies and Cream ice cream and then lie on the couch watching Oprah re-runs until I eventually fell asleep."
After that their friendship turned to mush. "We could no longer chat about boys, relationships or sex. And since there was pretty much nothing left to discuss, we soon stopped being friends altogether. Plus seeing them out together made me want to puke. It wasn't a nice experience at all."
Ah yes, the 11th commandment: "Thou shalt not date thy friend's ex". But what if you're stuck in a dating ghetto? Is it avoidable?
"No! It's almost impossible to meet someone new," sniffs Jodi.
So what to do if you find yourself falling for a mate's old date?
Well according to male portal Askmen.com, if you can't avoid the icky situation then at least you can at least attempt to watch your timing.
"Some men have a one-year rule with their best friend, some place a five-year moratorium on dating an ex. And then you have the group of men for whom the subject is taboo."
Says dating consultant Baileys, "A certain elapsed time would have to come to pass before you'd hook up with your friends ex. Say 8-12 months for the wounds to heal."
And if you've simply fallen in love with your mate's old partner, and there's nothing to do but follow it through? Then according to the experts there are a few simple rules to follow;
Be open and honest with your friend before getting serious with their ex; limit your display of affection in front of your mate, (at least until they get used to it); do not seek your friend's advice or talk about your relationship with them, and never bring up your sex life - save the pillow talk for your other friends.
And remember, there's always going to be consequences. Perhaps decide who's more important, the fling or the friend?
You can have em, ping!
"We could no longer chat about boys, relationships or sex. And since there was pretty much nothing left to discuss
Whatta wuss!
Just pinging...
Geez, no wonder he left her for her friend.
Solution: Date your best friends sister so when she is your 'ex' he won't date her (*rule not applicable in TN*)
The first time I read it, I thought it was about a homosexual couple...
Any man brave enough to date one of my ex's is welcome to them...
One girl dated two of my ex boyfriends...she always waited for me to work the kinks out of them, then she took them. She married one of them...they're divorced now.
She gets ice cream and Oprah, her friends gets her man. I guess they have different priorities.
--paraphrased, from someone.
"I proceeded to cry for half an hour, eat an entire tub of Cookies and Cream ice cream and then lie on the couch watching Oprah re-runs until I eventually fell asleep."
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A bullet's quicker. |
"When a man opens the car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife."
"He was so lazy that he married a pregnant woman."
"She had been married so many times that she had rice marks on her face."
Did you go to the wedding?
My best friend and I were back in Fort Worth on a break during our senior year in college. I had invited him to come to the bar where my group of Fort Worth friends hung out. I had also called an ex-girlfriend (part of the group) and told her that I was going to be in town and let's all meet at the "Pig" (Pig and Whistle Pub in Fort Worth).
The best friend heard "Let's have guy's night out"... the ex heard "Let's get back together and go out on a date". I show up at the Pig and... after a few minutes... both of them are mad at me... the friend for bringing a date to guy's night out and the ex for bringing a guy to our date.
They spent the evening in the pool room talking about what a bastard I was and by the end of the evening had fallen for each other.
They got married a couple of years later.
If you are into playing with fire, and losing a friend.
That's funny & kinda cute. Are they still together?
I wasn't invited...she was a coward anyway.
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