"Hi, Cindy. I'm Billy Jack."
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"Ohmygod! Billy Jack! You're, like, my all time biggest idle! I love the way you
speak truth to power. Billy, did the universe choose you to pay me a visit?!"
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" The universe? No. I was sent by that homely chick over at Code Pink. Look,
the reason I'm here is.... Hold on. Here comes the Press with their camera
crews."
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"Nope. False alarm."
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"As I was saying, I'm here to telll you that you've got to knock it off with all this
hippy protesting stuff. The sixties are over, man. Even I don't do this crap
anymore. No one's buying your schtick. The Media can't prop you up any longer
and you've become an embarrassment to all us sixties icons. Enough."
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"But what will I do?"
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"Well, I have some good news and I have some bad news. The good news is I
got you a gig on the Love Boat. The bad news is... it was cancelled over 20
years ago! Ha ha- just kidding. Ahem, seriously though, I know a couple of guys
in Hollywood that are dusting off the old Gong Show. They're putting it back on
the air with Al Gore as MC! Now, all three judge slots are filled, but if I pull a
few strings I just might be able to get you a one shot deal as a contestant. Er, can
you sing or dance?"
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"Ummm....I can cry on cue and make up stories!"
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"That's swell,Cindy. Well, I better get going. So long."
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"Peace!"
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"Whatever."
