All your black boxes are belong to us! :-)
Here's a new commercial:
"We used to not win elections, but here at the Republican Research and Voting Disenfranchisement Facility, we're making new strides at the ballot box," said Tom Delay, scorned Representative and Project Leader.
Partnering up with Diebold, we've come up with a way to count only Republican votes. That's right. Every liberal voter is sure to be disenfranchised, no matter how many times he or she votes. It's a guaranteed win for Republicans, even in places like Massachussetts or L.A. We're calling it the Diebold Ballot Buster.
Listen to some of our testimonials:
"I didn't believe it was true, but the new, Diebold Ballot Buster gave us that long sought after victory we'd always wanted," said Mark Gillman, President of the Ohio Republican Party.
"It's true. It really works," quipped Jeb Bush, Governor of Florida. "Why do you think the Florida election went so smooth? Thanks, Diebold. I know what we can count on come 2006, 2008 and beyond. The sky's the limit!"
"That's right," Tom Delay said gleefully. "Thanks to Diebold, we're sure to have Republican victory's for years and years. And with a little luck, the new Diebold 50X and more research, we'll be able to implement it into the U.S. Senate in time to fulfill the Bush legacy."
:) HA!