FROM: Most Learned Bagel-Snarfing Neocon Elder of Zion #5
TO: Distribution List
SUBJ: OPERATIONAL SECURITY
1. Recent OPSEC violations have me and our Unseen Masters concerned. We must tighten up our security posture.
2. MLBSNEZ #1 has directed us to increase our alert posture from HARVEST GOLD to TANGERINE. (Why did we have to listen to "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" for our alert posture color codes, anyway?)
3. Additionally, we are to use the reverse-engineered alien craft from Area 51 as a diversion. Specific flight assignments will be posted in the break room. All MLBSNEZs are to pass a closed-book NATOPS exam prior to going on alert duty. (The guy in charge of the flying saucers is still snarked off at the late MLBSNEZ #18, for having the bad form to drill his flying saucer into the ground at 12,000 MPH. Come on, these things happen sometimes. Then again, these things cost 40 gigabucks apiece, so I can see his point.)
4. Speaking of the break room...thank you one and all for improving the cleanliness of that room. Keep up the good work.
Sincerely,
MLBSNEZ #5
Hey,that wasn't supposed to be made public and you left out #23.
SIERRA ECHO TANGO
BRAVO ECHO ECHO BRAVO ECHO ROMEO SIERRA
TANGO OSCAR
SIERRA TANGO UNIFORM ECHO
Thanks for the Operational Security Briefing. We shouldn't be surprised to find ourselves up to our asses in alligators. Perhaps we'll remember not to be so nonchalant after brass shows us the exact length and width of the shaft.