THERE OUGHTA BE A LAW - Various Laws about life.

Williamson labs ^ | FR Post 1-24-05 | Various

[vannrox]

THERE OUGHTA BE A LAW

• O'Reilly's law of the kitchen: Cleanliness is next to impossible.
• Lieberman's law: Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.

• Denniston's law: Virtue is its own punishment.

• Gold's law: If the shoe fits, its ugly.

• Conway's law: In any organization, there will always be one person who knows what is going on. This person should be fired.

• Finster's law: A closed mouth gathers no feet.

• Lynch's law: When the going gets tough, everyone leaves.

• Muir's law: When we try to separate anything out by itself, we find it hitched to everything else in the universe.

• Glyme's formula for success: The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.

• Mason's first law of synergism: The one day you'd sell your birthright for something, birthrights are a glut.

• Hanlon's razor: Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.

• Handy guide to modern science: If it's green or wriggles, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics.

• Green's law of debate: Anything is possible if you don't know what you're talking about.

• Stewart's law of retroaction: It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.

• First rule of history: History doesn't repeat itself, historians merely repeat each other.

• Oliver's law of location: No matter where you go, there you are.

• Harrison's postulate: For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.

[irishtenor]

Quigley's Law: The dirtier your hands are, the more your nose itches.