[PJ-Comix]

Back to Bev Harris again but it is worth it. I have a feeling Bev will soon be making mandatory appearances on Court TV. And remember, the DUFUs was the first place that recorded Bev's con artistry. If you are a literary agent or book publisher, please keep me from groveling before you any more by simply e-mailing me at PJ-Comix and hit me with a BIG TIME book deal.

No AM DUFU edition tomorrow but the large size of this edition should tide you DUFU addicts over until the PM edition tomorrow. And if you want to receive regular updates of the DUmmie FUnnies as they come out, just let me know if you want on the PING List.

[Charles Henrickson]

My faves from this thread . . .

BEV, Inc.'s comments about the paltry sum "spent or committed" [i.e., not spent] on what the money actually was given for; her repeated references to "infrastructure" [i.e., slush fund]; and the hilarious "off-election funding droughts" [i.e., perpetuating the BEV, Inc. lifestyle]:
Donations tagged to Randi Rhodes show: $23,800
All donations, some of which we have allocated to building infrastructure and off-election funding droughts: About $300,000. . . .
We have spent or committed about $19,000 of the $23,800 . . . for FOIA requests and related legal expenses. . . .
(By "committed" I mean that . . . , so of course we haven't handed over the money yet. . . .)

And the DUmmyRat admission:
. . . we have followed a rat charmer. . . .

[Nasher]

So the story goes something like this?

DUmmies donate 300k with delusions of getting the election overturned. Now they're getting really panicky as the Electors have already voted and the inauguration is fast approaching. (Tick, tock, tick, tock...)

Meanwhile, slick Bev is living the carefree life, basking away down in Florida...courtesy of senseless DUmmies.

When Bev's escapades end in Florida, she's forced to finally hear it from the DUmmies mouthpiece, Err Amerika. The DUmmies want to know where Bev has been hiding for the past month.

Bev thinks that the DUmmies will buy a story that her phone lines were manipulated by a group of Republican operatives. They don't buy it when she has no explanation as to why she also doesn't answer her e-mails - oops!

Bev has to scramble so she puts out a statement on her website. It is liberal speech at it's very finest. (I had the best intentions, don't look at my results and besides...it was someone else's fault)

I had the best intentions - "...our small organization, with just two full time employees and a volunteer, were supposed to bootstrap our way into overturning a presidential election"

Don't look at my results - "The fund raising was specifically for Freedom of Information requests, and was never for the purpose of overturning an election...Some people began to hope that Black Box Voting would reverse the presidential election."

It was someone else's fault - "John Kerry literally ran away from the idea of doing any auditing or recounts...I do believe that the person most responsible for failure to get an accountable election is John Kerry himself"

Some of the DUmmies fall for the good liberal explanation, leave DU to join Bev's message board and continue to fund the gravy train.

This is just too rich!

[cgbg]

PJ--Excellent job.

But...you did miss one rather easy one :-)

I certainly wouldn't just barge in without an invitation

Gee, I wonder if we think hard enough if we could think of an occasion when Bev barged in somewhere without an invitation. ;-)

[NRA1995]

"I was not asked to go to Ohio and testify, and I certainly wouldn’t just barge in without an invitation."

That didn't stop you from barging in in Florida, did it?

[KSCITYBOY]

Harris is a con and "airhead America" helped her in her con. Liberals let their hatred of Republicans separate them from their money again.

[SCALEMAN]

Let me see if I've got this. Bev makes 60k. Someone else makes ~50k. She has collected over 300k (admitted). Seems she has enough money to float her through to the next elections (off year in '06). After salaries, she will have somewhere near 100k left over through '06.

I especially liked the statement about web hosting costing several thousands. BS. I own a business and have a web site. It costs me less than $300/yr. Bookkeeping expenses. Buy a copy of Quickbooks for ~$200.

[Flux Capacitor]

----I spoke with one of Randi Rhodes’ producers this morning, and had a very good conversation.----

==========

"Hello, Air America! May I help you?"

Yes, I'd like to speak to Ms. Rhodes, please.

"Would this be about the stolen presidential election that Karl Rove won with his supernatural mind-control powers for that damn idiot George Bush and about how Republicans are inbred hicks who should die die die die die?"

Why, yes! How did you know?

"Lucky guess. Look, Randi would be happy to speak to you, but first I'd like to ask you something. Would you, by any chance, have an extra $150,000 to spare?"

Excuse me?

"Yes, we ask all our callers about that before putting them on the air. As you probably know, Air America has to buy all of its airtime because no stations will agree to carry our shows otherwise. All the potential advertisers we approached when we were setting this thing up said 'thanks but no thanks'. So as you can understand, we're kind of strapped for cash and we have to pick up what we can wherever we can. So, you got that 150 grand on you? We take Visa, MasterCard, American Exp--"

Gosh, I'm sorry, no; I've been unemployed for six years and donated my last twenty bucks to the Spotted-Owl Distemper Awareness Fund....

"Oh well, that's all right then. We'll put you on the air anyway. Just be sure to speak clearly and make your points concise and straightforward. You're going on.... now."

Oh thank you, thank you! Hello, Randi?

(**Dial tone**)

[Tijeras_Slim]

I persuaded two benefactors to provide $10,000 each.

Best $20K Karl Rove and Richard Mellon Schaife ever spent.

[beltfed308]

[This will add one salary, and will add fixed cost for office space and additional accounting. In addition, we need to bring in a development director to write grant proposals and set up a permanent fund raising structure.]


The second part of the scam! The writing of grants is to get federal money. Now she is scaming the taxpayer!

I think I will invent something just for the Dummies. The DIMOMETER (Patent Pending). It will detect fraud by voice stress by use of a single LED bulb connected to micro compressed tin foil. The brighter it glows the safer it is to make a decision. It will also feature non rechargeable batteries in a sealed unit to be enviromentally friendly. Battery life will be advertised to be good for 20 years.

I can see my millions already!

[TheGeezer]

I am one of those that was referred to in an earlier post today about being three paychecks from homeless... only I am tetering on more like a days pay from homeless sometimes... especially with kids at christmas time. I didn't put that much in that jug, but if I could have snatched it back out of that jug I would have with no remorse.

I wonder what she pays for an ISP? If I were only one day's pay away from being homeless (and my, my, her landlord must be fast with evictions!) I wouldn't be twaddling my precious cash away on the Web...

[granite]

DU FU Who's YU

kerry abandonded us.

and now maybe we should get some shit straight as far as : who is "us", and who is "Them".

"we" were abandonded at the first sign of trouble.

"they", as far as this board is concerned, banned any folks that think like I do as "troublemakers".

"we" are moderate democrats, that are here; more than willing to help for the cause.

so maybe "you" ought to get with the fucking program.

"WE" are here.



Are you?

[fastattacksailor]

Most of the DUmmies refuse to see the light, don't they?

What a bunch of dupes.....

[underdognewsgrl]

"...the drama makes us all seem like we have followed a rat charmer out of the hamlet"

Heh-heh...the unconscious never lies. Should be 'rat charmer though.

[Kornev]

"My salary is $60,000 per year, about half what I was making before I took on this mission."

What an unbelievable lie. If anyone has heard this woman, you can tell she isn't exactly all there and isn't intelligent at all. I suspect she meant it's twice what she made before.

[ariamne]

My all time favorite thread!! Been waiting all evening for an new DUmmy Funny! Please don't ever stop..

[beans36]

If Bev had blamed all of her problems on Karl Rove she could have scammed another $250K out of the DUmmies.

[mabelkitty]

Bev Harris will get nailed when she files her tax forms.
The IRS doesn't take kindly to folks who use foreign funds to infiltrate our system of government, and I sense all those foreign donations from Indymedia.org may have caught someone's attention when their servers were picked up in the fall.