Spec #1: Gross Public Dumb
Walt views himself as The Big Dog LINK
I prefer to view him as a little toy poodle. There he sits, fangs bared, making like he is fearsome, and all the while laughably ridiculous. The Big Dog indeed. Woof! But maybe I shouldn't be too hard on him... he can't help it if he is genetically inferior... having been loaded up with the stupid gene.
Heck, I was just having some fun tweaking him. It can be a lot of fun. Why, just look at how ridiculous he looks right now, trying to defend James Mitchell. Ah heck, Mitchell, Lincoln, what's the difference?
Well, maybe Lincoln was better prepared than Mitchell. When Lincoln died, the only money he had on him was a five dollar bill. But Lincoln was prepared. It was a Confederate five.
Spec #1: Gross Public Dumb
The same may be said for most of his followers as well. I had a little time off recently to compose...err...intercept the second installment of their meetings though:
SUPER DUPER ULTRA SECRET TRANSCRIPT OF THE WLAT BRIGADE:
The Quasi-Monthly Meeting of the Wlat Brigade
-or-
Why the Neo-Reconstructionists Have Taken a Strong Turn to the Left
mac_truck: Greetings fellow brigadiers! I convene to order quasi-monthly meeting of the Wlat Brigade and introduce to you our glorious leader: I present to you the Keeper of the Northern Faith, Defender of The Precious, Lord High Protector of The Union, and Leader of the Wlat Brigade, restored from his previous exile upon the Sea of Google to his rightful place in the Free Republic, Wlat!
Wlat: The Precious...my brigade. To order we must! Apprentice mac, to secrecy we go. Enact the code!
mac_truck: Brigadiers - to preserve the integrity of this meeting from the evil realm of the monarchists whose 170 year conspiracy to destroy our Union for purposes of requisitioning its land upon the queen's name, who desire so fervently to employ its resources towards their international attempts to requisition our precious bodily fluids, who orchestrate their workings amidst the LOSer separatists, who dump upon us their tools of their wicked freemasonry and lewrockwell.com, who mockingly call us by the name "leftist" to spite our expressed desired namesake of "progressives," and who campaign for our banishment from this meeting hall known as the free republic, I invoke the secret code.
justshutupandtakeit: Did you say monarchy? I like monarchy...
Ditto: Is this thing on?
mac_truck: Brigadiers, to your specially issued decoder rings!
justshutupandtakeit: ...but only as long as its not called monarchy...
mac_truck: On my mark break seals...now!
justshutupandtakeit: ...and is called a magistrate, which is a monarchy...
mac_truck: Prepare to set decoders on my mark. Commence countdown...3...2...
justshutupandtakeit: ...but a magistrate isn't really a monarchy though since it is a magistrate...
mac_truck: ...1...mark. Foxtrot-Charlie-Delta-3-7-4-Quebec-6-2-9er. Stop. Confirm code:Yankee-Alpha-November-Kilo-Echo-Echo
-5-7-6-Delta-Oscar-Oscar-Delta-Lima-Echo-6-2-9er. Stop.
Non-Sequitur: 6-2-9er confirmed
Ditto: 6-2-9er locked and over.
justshutupandtakeit: 6-2-9er.
Grand Old Partisan: Excellent handling of the code, mac! 6-2-9er.
Wlat: 6-2-9er...and...lock. Buzzard circling the carcas. Repeat. Buzzard circling the carcas...and clear. The Precious is secure.
Grand Old Partisan: If I may direct everyone's attention for a moment, I'd like to offer you a special opportunity to buy my bo..
Wlat: ORDER! Let there be order. I know call upon the Imam rdf to provide us with the invocation.
rdf: Let us set forth our prayer mats and genuflect toward the temple of Lincoln. In the beginning there was the Union. And the Union was whole...one...united...Union. And the Union was good, said the united unificators in unity of the Union! And the Union was saved. Saved in the name of the Precious. The Lincoln. Our Father Abraham we call to you in the name of the Union you saved, you created, you preserved. The Union which gives us government, which gives us states to administer its will, which gives us...you, Father Abraham.
Wlat: Praise be!
rdf: We ask upon you to carry us forth your will in the blessed laws you have laid before us, the Tax'ria. Carry us forth into jihad against the neo-confederates as you carried the Union into jihad! And always remember my brothers in Lincoln, one fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish, knick knack, paddy whack, give a dog a bone! We wait until the will of the prophet Lincoln, the beneficient and merciful, may he soon return to us, sets forth and saves the Union again...the one...the Lincoln...the madhi Lincoln, from his under the hill we await your proclamation! Rest, oh ye followers of the Abratollah for the Precious is upon us!
Ditto: (clap...clap...clap)
Wlat: Thank you, imam richard.
rdf: I must now retire.
Wlat: We have much to discuss, my brigadiers. The Precious, attack it they will. The neoconfederates desire the precious. Desire it they do to destroy it.
Non-Sequitur: Squack! Destroy it they will! Tu quoque! Tu quoque! Like Lee destroyed Chambersburg! Squack!
mac_truck: But master, what shall we do?
Wlat: We have no choice but to counter...but to reveal. Reveal ourselves we shall. Reveal our Democrat selves.
Waltrot: But no! Hide it we must...for the precious...for the republicans...the republicans are our...our friends.
Grand Old Partisan: I wrote a book about the Republicans which you can purchase for only $29.9...
Ditto: But Walt! Isn't that what got you exiled last time? For revealing your Democrat affiliations?
mac_truck: No! That is only what they want you to believe.
Ditto: They?
mac_truck: The New World Order! Bush Sr. said it...in his speech. I heard it with my own eyes and Art Bell told me so!
Wlat: I'd vote for Bill Clinton again 1000 times out of 1000 over that retard clown dubya's pappy. He kept his son out of the draft
Non-Sequitur: Squack! Tu quoque! Daddy kept em out! Squack! Just like Jefferson Davis and little Joe, he did! Daddy kept 'em out too! Squack!
mac_truck: Yes, the New World Order exiled Walt to the Sea of Google and only by the merciful grace of Father Abraham did our leader return. But they are conspiring again. The New World Order. And the Queen of England, all through their paid neoconfederate henchmen on Free Republic, hired with the drug money of Buckingham palace. They're the same ones who impeached Bill Clinton, you know. Those...those...FREEPERS! The Vast Right Wing Conspiracy!
Wlat: But the Republicans are our cover and blow that cover...we cannot...preeeecioussss.
...stay tuned for future installments