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Oral-sex issue hits middle schools (posted 6/10/2002)
Lexington Herald Leader ^ | Jun. 09, 2002 | Valarie Honeycutt Spears

Posted on 06/10/2002 4:35:38 AM PDT by Pern

Isolated incidents of oral sex on campus and talk among middle-school students of the behavior occurring at off-campus parties has alarmed some Fayette County school administrators and parents who plan meetings on the topic.

Physicians, including one who has seen an increase in sexually transmitted diseases among middle school students, and other professionals are promoting frank discussions about oral sex to discourage students from engaging in it. Still, all agree the practice is limited to a small number of students, some of whom do not equate oral sex to intercourse.

Since Beaumont Middle School principal Tom Mowery wrote to parents in December asking them "to be aware of the prevalence of oral sex at off-campus parties at the middle-school level," administrators at one school referred an incident to law enforcement, and administrators at another school, Jessie Clark Middle, called in parents to discuss a situation.

Diane Woods, the district's middle school director, put the topic on the agenda for a future principals meeting. She said she was notified of a report of oral sex occurring between two students on campus at Tates Creek Middle School several weeks ago.

Without releasing specifics, Tates Creek Middle School assistant principal Earl Stivers said the incident was investigated "both by law enforcement and administratively."

Students' remarks have made doctors and parents fear the activity is more widespread.

Dr. Hatim Omar, a University of Kentucky specialist in adolescent medicine, said that just since January, he has treated at least 10 middle school-age students for sexually transmitted diseases they said they had contracted through oral sex. That's up from six cases in 2001 and two each in 1999 and 2000.

Four students, treated for tonsillitis caused by gonorrhea, attributed their conditions to so-called "head parties," Omar said.

Also since January, he has seen students from every middle school in Fayette County who admit that they have engaged in oral sex or attended parties where students have engaged in oral sex.

Parents and administrators are responding. Besides principals addressing the topic, Beaumont PTA president Debbie Boian wants middle school PTA leaders to discuss developing programs at each school to talk to students about risky behavior.

"It's easy to say, 'Oh those kids are just bragging about having oral sex,'" Boian said. "But if there is any truth to it, you should" address the issue.

Nationally, public-health experts report that teen-agers appear to be engaging in high-risk sexual practices without caution and with alarming casualness. Nearly 1 in 10 reports losing his or her virginity before the age of 13, a 15 percent increase since 1997, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. According to several surveys, as many as half of teens ages 13 to 19 say they have had oral sex. Other communities across the country are grappling with the problem and are instituting policies that require more supervision and education.

Lexington pediatrician Tom Pauly said his patients are asking him about oral sex and telling him they think it's safer than vaginal intercourse.

"It's a new issue," said Bryan Station Middle Counselor Lynette Schmiedeknecht. "It's more part of the culture, more talked about. It seems that in talking with the kids, they don't consider oral sex (to be) sex. They just think it's something they do as an adolescent."

Dealing with incidents directly and speaking bluntly with middle school students is key to helping them understand the ramifications of their decisions, parents and doctors said. Damage to reputations and illnesses are two of the dangers.

"We advise them to abstain," Pauly said. "We talk about medical complications and the psychosocial complications of engaging in oral sex at such a young age."

After Jessie Clark Middle students talked about the popularity of oral sex with an assistant principal this spring, principal Steve Carmichael said: "We invited two moms to come in and shared our concerns. It wasn't a conversation as awkward as you might think. We would rather overreact than underreact."

The issue isn't a routine part of sex education classes, officials said.

Mike Kennedy, acting health education coordinator, said that until 1990, the district had a sex education curriculum. But now, site-based councils at each school are responsible for deciding what kind of sex education is dispensed, he said.

Seven middle schools offer programs that teach abstinence only, Kennedy said. Other schools cover sex education in health classes. But Kennedy said he doesn't think oral sex is discussed anywhere as part of the middle school curriculum.

At Beaumont, principal Mowery said the quick intervention -- writing to parents -- was successful. Parents responded to meetings about how to discuss sexual issues with their children. And as the year progressed, counselors and administrators had fewer kids talking about the parties.

Only a small minority of students have actually had oral sex, Mowery thinks.

"Ninety percent of our kids," he said, "make good decisions in every aspect of their lives."


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To: JediGirl
someone can't read...post 136

is irrelevant to the point. Pick any number you like: 3 months, 6 months, a year. (I guarantee if you start at a year at 14 it will be down to a month by 28, so you can factor that in, as well.)

181 posted on 06/10/2002 2:47:44 PM PDT by Campion
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Comment #182 Removed by Moderator

To: Campion
"When I say "more than 3 months" it doesn't mean, exactly 3 months. It means longer than a short period of time so that you have a pretty well established idea as to who he is."
183 posted on 06/10/2002 2:48:14 PM PDT by JediGirl
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To: nopardons
Are you married and do you have any children ; or is this all just hypothetical on your part ? I think that answering this , would take some heat off you.

I'm 17. (check my profile) :-D

184 posted on 06/10/2002 2:49:04 PM PDT by JediGirl
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To: JediGirl
Yeah, we've seen post 136. Is three months an average, or is it a lower limit? If it's a lower limit, what do you think the average is?
185 posted on 06/10/2002 2:49:56 PM PDT by Campion
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To: Campion
Serious relationships don't have a time limit on them.....one can go years in between serious relationships. I know you aren't really this ignorant :) This isn't a game of semantics. Stop making it out to be one.
186 posted on 06/10/2002 2:50:25 PM PDT by JediGirl
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Comment #187 Removed by Moderator

To: yendu bwam
"The girls have devalued themselves enormously."

Yes, they are bought cheaply. Bargain-basement girls don't get far in life. They will wake up some day in the future and wonder where the years have gone. They will look in the mirror, and an older woman will look back. Their biological clocks will be running out, and there won't be much hope in their future.

188 posted on 06/10/2002 2:52:41 PM PDT by Don Myers
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To: philetus
They do. Please see my post #58, Phil. This article threw me out of joint. I'm still not completely back in joint. --SB
189 posted on 06/10/2002 2:53:12 PM PDT by Savage Beast
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To: Surfin
Heard it a million times :-D

I will be libertarian for as long as I live. Conservatism and liberalism are too extreme of philosophies and conservatism is hypocritical in the sense that it uses more government to achieve their aims instead of using other means, thus contradicting its stated goal of reducing the size of the government.

190 posted on 06/10/2002 2:53:59 PM PDT by JediGirl
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To: Don Myers
Yes, they are bought cheaply. Bargain-basement girls don't get far in life. They will wake up some day in the future and wonder where the years have gone. They will look in the mirror, and an older woman will look back. Their biological clocks will be running out, and there won't be much hope in their future.

Are all non-virgins who've yet to be married 'bargain-basement girls'?

191 posted on 06/10/2002 2:55:01 PM PDT by JediGirl
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To: JediGirl
This isn't a game of semantics. Stop making it out to be one.

You're just being evasive, because you don't want to address the issue.

As for "going years between serious relationships," having been 17, and 18, and (all the years up to 41), I recall going, on average, about 3 weeks between relationships I considered "serious," unless I was too traumatized by the last one and wanted to be left alone for awhile.

192 posted on 06/10/2002 2:55:50 PM PDT by Campion
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To: JediGirl
At 17 ( I suspected that you were young ), you're just spoiting off, and don't have enough life experiences to REALLY know what you will or will not do, when you are a parent. You're debating with parents .

One thing , that's an absolute certainty, is that what you think / say at 17, is going to change quite a lot, when you are a parent ; especially when you're a parent of a 12 year old. At least we all hope that you'll mature and grow with age.

193 posted on 06/10/2002 2:57:02 PM PDT by nopardons
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To: nopardons
megadittos, nopardons :-)
194 posted on 06/10/2002 2:57:56 PM PDT by Campion
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To: JediGirl
At 17 ( I suspected that you were young ), you're just spouting off, and don't have enough life experiences to REALLY know what you will or will not do, when you are a parent. You're debating withadults, who are parents . For you, this is all just hypothetical !

One thing , that's an absolute certainty, is that what you think / say at 17, is going to change quite a lot, when you are a parent ; especially when you're a parent of a 12 year old. At least we all hope that you'll mature and grow with age.

195 posted on 06/10/2002 2:58:04 PM PDT by nopardons
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To: Campion
As for "going years between serious relationships," having been 17, and 18, and (all the years up to 41), I recall going, on average, about 3 weeks between relationships I considered "serious," unless I was too traumatized by the last one and wanted to be left alone for awhile.

Nice personal story. But your personal story isn't necessarily true for everybody.

196 posted on 06/10/2002 2:58:21 PM PDT by JediGirl
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To: nopardons
One thing , that's an absolute certainty, is that what you think / say at 17, is going to change quite a lot, when you are a parent ; especially when you're a parent of a 12 year old. At least we all hope that you'll mature and grow with age.

Allowing others to make their own decisions indicates immaturity? I see, that's right, the religious right knows what's best for everybody.

197 posted on 06/10/2002 2:59:37 PM PDT by JediGirl
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To: justshutupandtakeit
Thank you as well!

Most folks just refuse to believe what nasty pieces of work the 'Educrats' are.

From your post #165..."Public schools problems are caused by the parents of the students."

Sure. Demonize the parents AND the kids.

Public horse-whipping would be too kind a punishment for education establishmentarians!

I don't think the 'kids' are going to be in a very forgiving mood a decade from now. I, for one, will support whatever justice they can deliver to you lot.

198 posted on 06/10/2002 3:01:40 PM PDT by headsonpikes
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To: Surfin
Not exaactly. Winston Churchill said that if one iisn't a Liberal at 20 , then you have no heart. If one isn't a Conservative at 40 , then you have no brain.

If you're going to use that quote , at least get it right ...especially here on FR. : - )

199 posted on 06/10/2002 3:01:46 PM PDT by nopardons
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To: JediGirl
But your personal story isn't necessarily true for everybody.

Which is why I'm asking you about averages, which you aren't willing to talk about. I believe the research indicates that girls who lose their virginity at 15 have on average 4 sexual partners the first year. Now, assume that rate holds stable until they're 28. (28-15) * 4 = 13 * 4 = 52 partners.

You were saying?

200 posted on 06/10/2002 3:01:51 PM PDT by Campion
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