Posted on 06/10/2002 4:35:38 AM PDT by Pern
Isolated incidents of oral sex on campus and talk among middle-school students of the behavior occurring at off-campus parties has alarmed some Fayette County school administrators and parents who plan meetings on the topic.
Physicians, including one who has seen an increase in sexually transmitted diseases among middle school students, and other professionals are promoting frank discussions about oral sex to discourage students from engaging in it. Still, all agree the practice is limited to a small number of students, some of whom do not equate oral sex to intercourse.
Since Beaumont Middle School principal Tom Mowery wrote to parents in December asking them "to be aware of the prevalence of oral sex at off-campus parties at the middle-school level," administrators at one school referred an incident to law enforcement, and administrators at another school, Jessie Clark Middle, called in parents to discuss a situation.
Diane Woods, the district's middle school director, put the topic on the agenda for a future principals meeting. She said she was notified of a report of oral sex occurring between two students on campus at Tates Creek Middle School several weeks ago.
Without releasing specifics, Tates Creek Middle School assistant principal Earl Stivers said the incident was investigated "both by law enforcement and administratively."
Students' remarks have made doctors and parents fear the activity is more widespread.
Dr. Hatim Omar, a University of Kentucky specialist in adolescent medicine, said that just since January, he has treated at least 10 middle school-age students for sexually transmitted diseases they said they had contracted through oral sex. That's up from six cases in 2001 and two each in 1999 and 2000.
Four students, treated for tonsillitis caused by gonorrhea, attributed their conditions to so-called "head parties," Omar said.
Also since January, he has seen students from every middle school in Fayette County who admit that they have engaged in oral sex or attended parties where students have engaged in oral sex.
Parents and administrators are responding. Besides principals addressing the topic, Beaumont PTA president Debbie Boian wants middle school PTA leaders to discuss developing programs at each school to talk to students about risky behavior.
"It's easy to say, 'Oh those kids are just bragging about having oral sex,'" Boian said. "But if there is any truth to it, you should" address the issue.
Nationally, public-health experts report that teen-agers appear to be engaging in high-risk sexual practices without caution and with alarming casualness. Nearly 1 in 10 reports losing his or her virginity before the age of 13, a 15 percent increase since 1997, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. According to several surveys, as many as half of teens ages 13 to 19 say they have had oral sex. Other communities across the country are grappling with the problem and are instituting policies that require more supervision and education.
Lexington pediatrician Tom Pauly said his patients are asking him about oral sex and telling him they think it's safer than vaginal intercourse.
"It's a new issue," said Bryan Station Middle Counselor Lynette Schmiedeknecht. "It's more part of the culture, more talked about. It seems that in talking with the kids, they don't consider oral sex (to be) sex. They just think it's something they do as an adolescent."
Dealing with incidents directly and speaking bluntly with middle school students is key to helping them understand the ramifications of their decisions, parents and doctors said. Damage to reputations and illnesses are two of the dangers.
"We advise them to abstain," Pauly said. "We talk about medical complications and the psychosocial complications of engaging in oral sex at such a young age."
After Jessie Clark Middle students talked about the popularity of oral sex with an assistant principal this spring, principal Steve Carmichael said: "We invited two moms to come in and shared our concerns. It wasn't a conversation as awkward as you might think. We would rather overreact than underreact."
The issue isn't a routine part of sex education classes, officials said.
Mike Kennedy, acting health education coordinator, said that until 1990, the district had a sex education curriculum. But now, site-based councils at each school are responsible for deciding what kind of sex education is dispensed, he said.
Seven middle schools offer programs that teach abstinence only, Kennedy said. Other schools cover sex education in health classes. But Kennedy said he doesn't think oral sex is discussed anywhere as part of the middle school curriculum.
At Beaumont, principal Mowery said the quick intervention -- writing to parents -- was successful. Parents responded to meetings about how to discuss sexual issues with their children. And as the year progressed, counselors and administrators had fewer kids talking about the parties.
Only a small minority of students have actually had oral sex, Mowery thinks.
"Ninety percent of our kids," he said, "make good decisions in every aspect of their lives."
In my experience the smart and decent boys are taken and skinned; exploited, by the girls in high school and undergraduate.
There are precious few good young people; now more (or less?) than ever.
What about all the potential "partners" who aren't interested in someone who puts out after only 3 months?
Oh, and NO, I am NOT ancient. : - )
Same to you: see post 136.
With all due respect, that's the same place I ended up, being chaste and proper.
Fair enough, JediGirl. But I can tell you that as a guy, I wouldn't look for a mate who had spent her highschool years with numerous boyfriends with whom she'd had sexual relations (even if she'd waited your prerequisite three months). Your trouble is, your sexual morality has been reduced to 1) getting to know the guy over a short period of time and 2) caring about him. I know and have known many guys who would take quick advantage of such a situation. We obviously come from a very different worldview with regard to sexual morality. If my daughter should find a husband who truly loves her, and saves herself for him, I honestly do believe that she will lead a far happier (and less dangerous) life than your daughter, who will be off having her safe sex with different guys that shes happens to care for. My son-in-law will value what my daughter will have achieved and has given him in a true lifelong commitment to marriage and family. Your future son-in-law will always know there was this other guy, and this other one, and this other one... He will always wonder just how committed she is, knowing all the guys she 'cares' about in her life.
I chose that word specifically.
After having tried them all out.
LOL! Can you believe that my friends and I were 16 and still running to the bathroom at parties to avoid being asked to slow dance. Boy have times changed.
Whiner. When you wrote post 114, you're telling everyone on this board how you think kids -- everyone's kids -- ought to be raised.
With all due respect, lady, what I tell my kids about sex, and when I tell it to them, and how I tell it to them, is none of your business. It's none of the state's business, either. It's none of the TV networks' business. You want to hold your "values" out as a model for the rest of us? Whatever, but don't whine to your atheist buddy jlogajan when some of us tell you we aren't interested in what you have to sell.
They seem to party hardy when they come to the US.
Actually, I've been raised by a family who places great emphasis on abstinence.
If my daughter should find a husband who truly loves her, and saves herself for him, I honestly do believe that she will lead a far happier (and less dangerous) life than your daughter, who will be off having her safe sex with different guys that shes happens to care for.
That is what you believe. There are just as many women who were not virigins when they were married who have happy and wonderful marriages, despite the fact that their hymen is not intact. Lack of virginity does not imply promiscuity.
"My son-in-law will value what my daughter will have achieved and has given him in a true lifelong commitment to marriage and family. Your future son-in-law will always know there was this other guy, and this other one, and this other one... He will always wonder just how committed she is, knowing all the guys she 'cares' about in her life.
That could be equally applied to the fact that many women have several boyfriends before meeting "the one"---should he ("the one") not trust her commitment to him because she has been in a relationship and deeply cared for men other than him?
Fair enough. The public schools do do some good. But on average, they do far less good than they used to (just look at the test scores over several decades). And in addition, they are inculcating values and ideas that are anathema to many. In our public school (in a well-off New Jersey suburb), a great many of the teachers don't know their own subjects well. Many are burnt out and don't really care that much about the kids. Our kids in this school know very little about our country and its history. They are being taught the joys of anal intercourse (and homosexuality) in sex ed. Kids are encouraged to get abortions without their parents even knowing. 15% of the high school kids here use hard drugs. Most of our high school graduates cannot speak or write particularly well. You can see why people have the disdain they do.
She can't "deeply care" for a guy without sleeping with him?
Right! The Public Schools are blazing new trails in innumeracy, illiteracy, and barbarism so that folks like you and your friends can latch onto the public teat like squealing weaner pigs. That, and be able to indoctrinate these hapless victims with your Rooseveltian socialist heiferdust.
The public schools are at war against American children; I encourage kids to fight back.
Hey, Kids!! Disrespect wrongful authority. Especially those arrogant creeps who tell you to just shut up and take it.
Touchy, aren't we? As soon as schools here get their abstinence only programs out of the classroom, i'll stop complaining. And you can turn off your television. Oh yeah, and I'm an atheist, too. Go whine about that.
I think men on average are rightly suspicious of women committing to them for life when such women have had many 'committed' and sexual relationships previously (and vice versa as well). And as for your family's raising you with abstinence stressed, it's still obvious that you yourself do not share that value, and that we don't.
If I slept with all the women I 'cared' about, I be one busy guy.
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