I could land it on the Bonneville Salt Flats. It might bounce a few times.
Or further west, a dry lake bed. I'd go with wheels up (it's not my plane!) and empty or near empty tanks.
No fuel, no fireball. Just a bumpy, VERY bumpy, skid and possible flip to a stop.
Everybody out of the pool!!! Use all the exits and any fractures in the fuselage! Help anyone who needs it...