In order.
1. Yes. (2. na)
2. Yes.
3. Very much yes.
4. Yes, and don't get me started!
5. In the nursing homes, I have seen folks revoke their DNR orders as they got closer to death, or fell and broke something (not the other way around). What defines quality of life definitely changes as you see the tomb ahead of you. Breathin' is usually better than not breathin'.(I am quoting a geezerette).
I have seen perfectly lucid folks who where in misery because no one ever came to visit. It seemed their rooms were always sad, cold and dark.
I have seen people like Terri be cared for like Queens for years by loving friends and family. Their rooms were always full of light and warmth (just a perception, I guess). While sad in some ways, it was a great testament to commitment, bonds and treating the person (or what remains of them) with respect and tenderness.
I have also seen folks like Terri eaten up with bedsores, moaning all the time, crying for their long dead Mamas and clearly living in hell. Them, yes, let them go.
Ya know, decubitus ulcers scare me WAY more than a PVS (they go to the bone and they are agony!). If I ever get any, I don't want to be conscious! So to answer your question, I don't know, because many folks I have known in her state don't appear to be suffering.
HOWEVER, I do know that being around someone like Terri does freak a lot of folks out (I have seen grown men run from the building). And it ain't because of love or caring. Or heartbreak or loss. It is much more primal..... someone like Terri is a reminder that we really don't have the control over our lives that we think we do. That we too could become totally helpless and at the mercy of others.
So, it's about us, its about how 'they' makes us feel in pointing out our potential fate.
erm,
and back to the questions,
6. No. (However, if I don't have one, and IF I marry again and he happens to be anything like before, please ignore ANYTHING he says...I can tell ya now, he'll be lyin').