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Love on a Porn Set: One Woman's Story (ABC Expose of Porn Industry)
ABC News ^ | 5/27/04

Posted on 05/28/2004 5:25:59 AM PDT by Aquinasfan

A Mormon Girl Gets Her Start in the Adult Movie Business

Jan. 23 — When 20-year-old Michelle saw the handsome Spaniard who would later become her fiancé, she thought it was love at first sight.

[WARNING: This article contains descriptions of sexual acts that some readers may find offensive.]

"The day we met, he said, 'You're going to be the mother of my children. I love you,'" she remembers. "You know what I mean? I never had that before. I never had a guy be so in love with me."

The couple met on the set of a porn film in a rented house in Prague in July 2001.

Michelle, the daughter of a retired Air Force captain and former bishop in the Mormon Church, was an up-and-coming starlet in the adult video world. She had had some setbacks in her first year in the business, but believed her career was turning around with the Prague trip, which would be her first starring role. Her co-star, 28-year-old Nacho Vidal, was already a well-established star.

The director had told Michelle that Vidal liked her work, and when the pair saw each other they immediately fell into each other's arms, kissing from one side of the house to the other.

"There's nothing bad about you," she told him admiringly as they prepared for the shoot. "You don't know me very well" he replied with a grin.

But when the director finally got the pair to settle down to the business at hand — filming a sex scene — the tone changed. Without any prompting, Vidal got rough during the sex, slapping Michelle's face violently from side to side, and choking her. [Pleased to meet you/Hope you guessed my name]

Afterward, she looked shaken, her face reddened and her eyes watery. But she insisted she was OK. "I look torn up — can you tell?," she asked an ABCNEWS producer who was following her progress for Primetime. Laughing and wiping her eye, she turned away and said without conviction, "I took a beating today, and it was great."

'Belladonna' Is Born

Michelle had gotten her start in the business at 18, when she came to Los Angeles from her home in Utah to look for work as a nude photograph model. When she failed to get modeling work, her agent encouraged her to try porn. She refused at first. "I always hated porn. I thought it was the most disgusting thing in the world," she told Primetime, which followed her career for more than two years.

But she finally agreed. Taking the name Belladonna, like the poisonous flower, she found herself preparing for what she thought would be a simple boy-girl sex scene. She was shocked when the director told her he wanted her to do anal sex — something she says she had never even thought about before. Worried she'd have to go through with it if she wanted to work again, she let him talk her into it. "I was kind of scared. I didn't know if I could say no," she remembers. "I didn't know any better, you know?"

After the session, she was shattered. "I wasn't ready for anal sex.... It was painful. But I can hide it really well." She had just turned 18, the legal age for participation in sexually explicit films.

Michelle went on more shoots over the next few months. Then her agent sent her on a job where she would have sex with male actors in prison outfits — 12 of them. Once again, she tried to back out, telling the director it was "sick," but once again she was talked into it. She had sex — all kinds — with the 12 men. "It was really hard because I really felt like a piece of meat ... in a lion's cage, 12 lions.... I had to do a lot of things I can't imagine anyone wanting to do." She was paid $4,000.

Afterward, she says, she couldn't stop crying. She packed her bags and went home to her family in Utah.

Glimpse of the Big Time

But within a year, she was back, even agreeing to promote the prison movie that had so upset her.

She began to feel that her career was picking up. She got a small part in a movie for VCA, one of the "high end" companies that produce big-budget films, and hoped it might lead to a contract. On the shoot, she met porn legend Ron Jeremy, who was making a cameo, and began to feel like she was fitting in. "The first second I walk in, this girl grabs my breast, and I'm like, Wow, you know, that's like the best welcome ... 'cause then you feel like, Oh, someone likes me, you know?"

Another company considered giving her a contract, but at a meeting, the owner, veteran porn star Ona Zee, sensed that Michelle was not emotionally ready to become an adult star. "There's a part of me that wants to say to you, 'Run for the hills, girl, do something else, because you can be something better,'" she told her.

At the high-end companies — which produce a small proportion of the thousands of adult titles released each year — performers often have contracts and can make six figures by shooting just eight to 10 movies a year. They can pick their own partners and condoms are generally required. Shot on film with elaborate, sets, costumes and plots, the movies can have budgets up to $250,000.

But Michelle did not get a studio contract, and ended up taking a job with a company known for "gonzo" porn — sex-only, amateur-looking productions shot on video. The company, Elegant Angel, was making a film in Prague and offered her a starring role, which she hoped would show the big studios that she could carry a film.

Love Blossoms in Prague

She was thrilled at the attention Vidal gave her during the week in Prague — but wary. "It's weird to have a guy love you that much. That almost scares me because I have a hard time trusting men," she told Primetime, explaining that her first boyfriend cheated on her repeatedly and ultimately left her for a stripper. Privately, Vidal had told Primetime he could never be with just one woman, and would be happy if Michelle's attraction did not lead anywhere.

She came back to Los Angeles by herself, so sore from the week's filming that she says she could hardly walk. But then she flew to Spain to visit Vidal, and their relationship seemed to be going places. She said he could keep having sex with other women, as long as he agreed to be "honest to me, loyal, and just respect me and tell me that I'm number one every day."

She even began hearing wedding bells, telling Primetime, "The second I get married, I won't having sex with men in this business any more."

Wedding Bells

By December 2001, Michelle and Vidal were engaged. As she proudly showed off her diamond ring, saying how pretty it was, Vidal joked in his Spanish accent, "I need to f—k so many girls for that ring."

The couple was in love, Michelle says, but they were fighting regularly. Vidal would sometimes get what he calls "Latino jealous" when he saw her talking to other men at clubs. Michelle told Primetime, "It's hard to be in a relationship with someone in porn."

By now, she was working steadily, even shooting for the same company she shot the prison gangbang for. "I guess now I've gotten past the whole feeling-bad-about-it thing. I'm like, 'OK, I did it and that was pretty damn rough of me' ... Like wow, you know?," she said with a laugh. "I can say that I've done pretty much everything there is to do, and I can walk away feeling a little proud about it, you know?"

The Primetime producers who had been following her noticed changes. At 18, she had said she would never use drugs, but now Primetime learned that she was sometimes high on marijuana during her scenes. She was working without condoms, though she said the risk of AIDS was never far from her mind — or her prayers. "The fans don't like to see condoms ... If I would have said I want to use condoms every time, I really wouldn't get any work," she explained. She contracted chlamydia, which can make you sterile.

And anal sex — which she had be talked into during her first shoot — was now her specialty. "Funny, isn't it? Something I didn't want to do and now I'm known best for it," she told Primetime. No longer a fresh face in the business, she found she had to agree to even riskier sex acts to earn the same money.

Ona Zee, the producer who had interviewed Michelle the previous year, noticed a difference, too. "I said to my husband, Our baby is all grown up and left home. She's no longer the adorable fresh-faced girl that I met ... Now she's really in the life ... Even in the pictures that I see of her, she's much harder, much tougher."

Behind the Smile

During interviews with Primetime, Michelle kept the happy smile she had always had — even when describing things that many people would find disturbing. However, her composure cracked when Diane Sawyer asked why she always smiled. Tears came to her eyes as she said, "Because I like to hide — hide everything, you know?" Then she began to cry, explaining that she hides her real emotions because she wants to show everyone how happy she is. "And I'm not happy ... I don't like myself at all," she said.

Michelle confessed she often felt physical revulsion during her scenes: "My whole entire body feels it when I'm doing it and ... I feel so — so gross." While pretending to be enjoying the sex, she said, she was in fact counting the minutes, telling herself, "Hey, I only have this much time left. Don't worry about it. Get the check. Gonna go deposit it in your bank." She admitted: "You get addicted to the money."

Like other performers Primetime spoke to, Michelle said that during shooting she often imagines herself outside her body. "I call it the 'other half,'" she said.

Bringing Home a Trophy

In January 2002, Michelle's Prague movie won an award at the Adult Video News awards in Las Vegas, considered the Oscars of the adult industry. Things were not going smoothly with Vidal that day — he complained that Michelle "don't do the ironing my clothes... I still 28 and I need my mother," and at the ceremony he openly checked out other women — but there were crowds of admiring fans for Michelle and she soaked up the attention.

After going on stage to pick the trophy, she was beaming, telling Primetime she had worked hard for it. "I think this is the very beginning of my career, like I've just begun," she said.

And at the 2003 AVN awards two weeks ago, Michelle was an even bigger winner, taking home awards for best supporting actress and three other categories.


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: catholiclist; porn
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To: TheBigB

There's nothing postable. I checked. My poor eyes hehehehe


81 posted on 05/28/2004 6:40:30 AM PDT by cyborg
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To: Aquinasfan
This is a tragic story. It's also a case of supply and demand. It's big business on the internet. Every time you hear some list of numbers about internet commerce - you can take at least half and place it in the porn category (if you want to hear some stammering, tell that to the next set of IT Consultants that go through their pitch in your office - but I digress).

The reason there's so much of it is because it sells. There is an evident wickedness about it - stealing and destroying lives and marriages - couldn't imaging being one of the parents in this situation.
82 posted on 05/28/2004 6:41:01 AM PDT by AD from SpringBay (We have the government we allow and deserve.)
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To: AppyPappy
Libertarians would just demand they put a label on the jar.

And that would fail to suffice how?

83 posted on 05/28/2004 6:42:06 AM PDT by Know your rights (The modern enlightened liberal doesn't care what you believe as long as you don't really believe it.)
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To: Aquinasfan
I would describe her story as a great human tragedy.

I daresay it is. However, it is not the place of government to protect people from self-inflicted tragedy. God designed the Universe to teach this principle, as evidenced by the fact that governments that ignore it end up creating far more bitter tragedies than they set out to prevent (one need only compare the idealism of Karl Marx with the mass murder of Josef Stalin).

84 posted on 05/28/2004 6:42:36 AM PDT by steve-b (Panties & Leases Would Look Good On Spammers)
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To: Aquinasfan

During the "sweep" TV programs report on SEX/PORN! What a culture! Then we act surprised when few trailer trash soldiers act out their porn filled fantacy with the Iraqi prisoners. It is the culture stupid!


85 posted on 05/28/2004 6:43:03 AM PDT by philosofy123
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To: ArGee
She was young and naive and victimized for it by a civilization that should be able to pride itself on protecting young and naive women.

The whole point of an age of consent is supposed to be that after this age people are expected to know what they are doing. We shouldn't have a legal standard and complain that people are too immature to make their own choices.

86 posted on 05/28/2004 6:44:37 AM PDT by garbanzo (Free people will set the course of history)
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To: Aquinasfan
promote the general Welfare

How on earth could someone have even the most cursory acquaintance with FR and still believe that the government is legitimately empowered to engage in social engineering under the guise of "promoting the general welfare"??

87 posted on 05/28/2004 6:45:14 AM PDT by steve-b (Panties & Leases Would Look Good On Spammers)
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To: garbanzo

I vaguely recall that most sexual activities outside of marriage were illegal when I was born a little over 30 years ago. I guess this country wasn't so great then. It's only been great since the federal courts decided to outlaw laws that have been on the books for several hundred years in localities across the nation. What a great country we now live in!

"We the people, in order to form a more perfect union, establish justice, and promote domestic tranquility . . ."


88 posted on 05/28/2004 6:45:41 AM PDT by petitfour
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To: AppyPappy
So if a person asks you to shoot him in the head, do you think it should be legal to shoot him? After all, it is voluntary. It's rather similar to paying a person to expose themselves to AIDS.

No, it's quite dissimilar, as the death rates are vastly different. We pay policemen and firemen to expose themselves to life-threatening situations; is that wrong?

89 posted on 05/28/2004 6:45:49 AM PDT by Know your rights (The modern enlightened liberal doesn't care what you believe as long as you don't really believe it.)
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To: 54-46 Was My Number
Is that the way you'd describe Michelle's story? I would describe her story as a great human tragedy. So would I. Your point?

Our description of the events is a description of the events in their most important sense.

It is the responsibility of individuals and individuals in community to promote the common good and to help remedy "great human tragedies," particularly tragedies that are the result of intrinsic evils that the government has failed to attempt to suppress, as is its duty.

To describe Michelle's tragedy as a consensual agreement between adults is to reduce it to the level of any other economic transaction, like receiving a fee to fix a leaking faucet. This description willfully disregards the moral component of Michelle's "transaction" in order to absolve the libertarian of any moral responsibility in helping to suppress this vice.

90 posted on 05/28/2004 6:46:00 AM PDT by Aquinasfan (Isaiah 22:22, Rev 3:7, Mat 16:19)
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To: LanPB01

As they say out west, "Riden hard, put up wet."


91 posted on 05/28/2004 6:46:29 AM PDT by anonymous_user (Telling the truth means you never have to change your story.)
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To: garbanzo

She was on Wendy Williams' tv show late at night and I saw her quite happy. If she is happy now still doing porno then I'll leave her alone. She'll leaves whenever she wants. Some people can't get away from the $$$$$ though.


92 posted on 05/28/2004 6:47:00 AM PDT by cyborg
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To: A.J.Armitage
Or are we to hear your pronouncements and rest satisfied that Authority has spoken?

Explain to me how pornography is not intrinsically evil.

93 posted on 05/28/2004 6:47:08 AM PDT by Aquinasfan (Isaiah 22:22, Rev 3:7, Mat 16:19)
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To: steve-b
it is not the place of government to protect people from self-inflicted tragedy. God designed the Universe to teach this principle, as evidenced by the fact that governments that ignore it end up creating far more bitter tragedies than they set out to prevent (one need only compare the idealism of Karl Marx with the mass murder of Josef Stalin).

Nicely put.

94 posted on 05/28/2004 6:47:10 AM PDT by Know your rights (The modern enlightened liberal doesn't care what you believe as long as you don't really believe it.)
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To: anonymous_user

Not from the last time I saw her. She has a really good surgeon. I wonder what these chicks will do when they can't get anymore surgery.


95 posted on 05/28/2004 6:48:14 AM PDT by cyborg
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To: 54-46 Was My Number
Sure they are, for tens of thousands, if not hundreds of thousands of people. Just not to you.

Look up "intrinsic."

96 posted on 05/28/2004 6:48:28 AM PDT by Aquinasfan (Isaiah 22:22, Rev 3:7, Mat 16:19)
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To: Aquinasfan
Explain to me how pornography is not intrinsically evil.

Attempting to reverse the burden of proof ("Prove that there aren't any fairies") is the last refuge of the intellectually bankrupt. Aquinas would weep.

97 posted on 05/28/2004 6:49:22 AM PDT by steve-b (Panties & Leases Would Look Good On Spammers)
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To: Maria S
his stuff is a sickness...both on the part of the males participating and the females that allow it.

Mostly on the part of the people who watch it.

Shalom.

98 posted on 05/28/2004 6:49:59 AM PDT by ArGee (After 517, the abolition of man is complete)
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To: Know your rights
We pay policemen and firemen to expose themselves to life-threatening situations; is that wrong?

If we do so without regard to their life, yes. We don't send firemen into burning buildings to save some guy's money stash or to make a film.

99 posted on 05/28/2004 6:50:15 AM PDT by AppyPappy (If You're Not A Part Of The Solution, There's Good Money To Be Made In Prolonging The Problem.)
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To: FITZ
No one wants their own daughter or other family member to end up like this

Why is that?

100 posted on 05/28/2004 6:50:40 AM PDT by AppyPappy (If You're Not A Part Of The Solution, There's Good Money To Be Made In Prolonging The Problem.)
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