uhmm... im in a really akward position...

4/10/2013 | noah rodriguez

[beaversmom]

Are you logged in?

Thanks to Rocky, I get it!

[never_eazii]

thanks... i needed that XD

[never_eazii]

Well, the only misspelling i found is uhm, and i meant to put that... thanks for the tip,and i only never care about my caps and stuff unless its a name, its just one of those things that a thirteen year-old kid that has straight “A”s and never lost in a spelling bee over looks :P

[never_eazii]

okay,thanks... guess i should wait, or stay active? this is really the only thing ive ever been a noob at...

[never_eazii]

ha. ha. very. funny. -.-

[never_eazii]

thanks, i guess youre the first person not to throw an insult, as far as i know... but, yeah, vanity thread? O.o

[never_eazii]

yeah, i sort of contradicted myself, sorry... it just wont let me edit my profile >.<

[Billthedrill]

Take some advice from an old-timer. The one thing you really don't want to do is post a vanity or insult the Admin Mods - well, that's two things - and then complain about how slow FR has gotten in a couple dozen vanity posts that do nothing but make the problem worse - well, that's three things. Another is not posting endless, rambling posts concerning nothing of any particular importance to the FR community at large. Like the time I had this really bad hangnail on my big toe. Hurt like a sumbitch, I want to tell you, but I wasn't really in a position to do anything about it - I was in the field with a new pair of combat boots and the zombies were all over the place, and well, it just didn't seem to me to be appropriate to take the boot off at the moment and anyway I didn't have any fingernail clippers or electrician's pliers, the Leatherman was stuck in a zombie forehead about a half-mile away and I wasn't going back for it. Now, a K-Bar is a great knife otherwise but when it comes to pedicure it leaves a good deal to be desired, and I didn't have a bayonet with me because I didn't have a bayonet lug on my Barrett because it would make it an illegal assault rifle. I considered shooting the hangnail off but the barrel is too long to reach my toe for that and anyway you can't dial in a range of 3 feet because the toe looks all blurry in the range finder and you wouldn't just want to pop off a shot in the general direction or in the direction of the general either. You could get latrine duty for that.

So what am I gonna do? You ask everyone else on the entire drop team if they have a spare set of nail clippers and they look at you like you're crazy but the fact is that they left their kits on the mother ship before you hit atmosphere and they're just as much out of luck as you are if they get a hangnail, which nobody is worrying about because we're all dodging zombies but dang it, it hurts and the toe is starting to swell up. You know that thing about for want of a nail the shoe was lost, the horse was lost, the trooper was lost, the battle was lost, the war was lost? Well, it applies to nail clippers too.

So what I did, see, was to break out the old P-38 can opener from my combat purse and head for the high ground. The zombies were milling around over by the atmosphere desalinization plant and so I had a few minutes to sort of pry at the thing and what do you know? It worked! But now it's getting toward lunch time and I know one of my buddies is going to want to use the thing to open a can of stewed prunes. I don't have any hand cleaner to sanitize it - left the kit on the mother ship, haven't you been paying attention? So I dunno, do you think I should tell him? You don't have any spare hand cleaner, do you?

[Darksheare]

Should be safe, the strange pleading bag of gravel is safely away.

[ZirconEncrustedTweezers]

I don’t do vanity threads simply because mine would be even more irrelevant than most of those that DO get posted. :)

[DJ MacWoW]

Democrat Song

[Tenacious 1]

this is really the only thing ive ever been a noob at...

A sense of humor too. ;o)

Welcome aboard. Make sure you bring a pillow case and your paddle to orientation.

(BTW - "Vanity" is any post that is original thoughts of your own, that does not link other publications or cite the work of others. This could include everything from what to do with a snake in your house to "Hugh and Series problems with beebers.")

[misharu]

Oh my goodness! You guys crack me up!!!!!

[Servant of the Cross]

Well, the only misspelling i found is uhm

You know I'm eazii ... eazii like Sunday morning ...

[no-to-illegals]

yep that was one of the quotes given to the caller.

[no-to-illegals]

Watch out now. I didn’t say that.

[Tenacious 1]

I don’t know why people complain about vanity threads. I think they are some of the most entertaining threads we get here on FR. I just don’t want to be the source of the entertainment. lol

[ScottinVA]

Have you undergone your universal background check yet?

[misharu]

Class of ‘99!! I just made it!