He said he had a daughter that he didn't know, her mother took her and jumped on a train out of town with a guy that looked like Chuck Norris. I'll have to tell him you look just like her. You weren't adopted were you?
Posted on 11/18/2005 5:50:36 AM PST by BJClinton
That's just poor plannin'.
Make him bring you some!
Bring me some!?!?
His name is Grumpy for a reason darlin'!
Pretend like you want his company or something, and then get tired!
It was like hanging out
with 2 big crazy brothers ;)
Who, Me? < hehehe>
I'm back...
He has NO food in his fridge, but 6 cases of Killians.
And he's cool with me just getting beer and leaving. 'sides, his sweat pants were sagging and Bubba-butt crack was more than I could handle.
As for you meeting with Max and R...I'm sooooo JELL AZZ!
That's the story of my life!
I'm headed to happy hour with six of my big crazy brothers.
Oy!
You can steal all of my images - except ones of Ruby, Dom Bear or me. All of my fun ones are up for grabs.
Enjoy!
But, that means I get to ride the bull dozer next time!
LOL on those sweat pants...
now thats a real southern man ;p
LOL on those sweat pants...
now thats a real southern man ;p
Once there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked beans.
She loved them but unfortunately, they had always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her.
Then one day she met a man and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry she thought to herself, "He is such a sweet and gentle man, he would never go for this carrying on."
She made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Some months later her car broke down on the way home from work.
Since she lived in the country she called her husband and told him that she would be late because she had to walk home. On her way, she passed a small diner and the odor of the baked beans was more than she could stand.
Since she still had miles to walk, she figured that she would walk off any ill effects by the time she reached home.
So, she stopped at the diner and before she knew it, she had consumed three large orders of baked beans.
All the way home she putt-putted, and upon arriving home she felt reasonably sure she could control it.
Her husband seemed excited to see her and exclaimed delightedly, "Darling, I have a surprise for dinner tonight."
He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the table. She seated herself and just as he was about to remove the blindfold from his wife,the telephone rang.
He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned. He then went to answer the telephone.
The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband was out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight to one leg and let it go.
It was not only loud, but i t smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of pulpwood mill.
She took her napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously.
Then, she shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more, which reminded her of cooked cabbage.
Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, she went on like this for another ten minutes.
When the telephone farewells signaled the end of her freedom, she fanned the air a few more times with her napkin, placed it on her lap and folded her hands upon it, smiling contentedly to herself.
She was the picture of innocence when her husband returned, apologizing for taking so long, he asked her if she peeked, and she assured him that she had not.
At this point, he removed the blindfold, and she was surprised!!!
There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish her a "Happy Birthday"!!!
Oh my goshhhhhhh
LMBO
"the post office wouldn't put my new name on the PO Box without the "main" boxholder there to OK it. "
That would be you... UNNGH!
I just love Postal Insanity.
He said he had a daughter that he didn't know, her mother took her and jumped on a train out of town with a guy that looked like Chuck Norris. I'll have to tell him you look just like her. You weren't adopted were you?
Been traveling most of the week. I'll be around next week.
I'm the good-looking one.
We were just glad she decided to put in on for the photo. Now I know why were getting such great service from Chris Rock.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.