The Babylon Bee's Predictions For 2025

Babylon Bee ^ | 12/31/2024 | Babylon Bee

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

November 27 - Trump orders mass incarceration of people who serve "tofurkey" for Thanksgiving dinner

All hail the god-emperor.

That abomination will never pollute the celebration feasts again.

[Telepathic Intruder]

I want to be in the first wave of shock troops invading Greenland. I can make a fortune collecting seal blubber.

[metmom]

Gotta love the Bee.

[BradyLS]

December 25 - Conservatives continue the annual holiday tradition of ripping each other to shreds on social media.

Probably. But remember: “Don’t start nothin.’ Won’t be nothin.’”

[C210N]

At publishing time, Jackson had come up short on her first day's reading, being stumped by the third word "people."

Not being a biologist has Consequences.

[GOPJ]

January 19 - Kamala Harris becomes first female president after Biden passes away peacefully in his sleep underneath her pillow January 20 - Donald J. Trump is sworn in as president, instantly making America great again... January 21 - Nancy Pelosi files new articles of impeachment against Trump May 31 - Disney executives weep after finding they have no more intellectual properties to destroy

Great list - Laz will love this one...

[Gay State Conservative]

later

[Liz]

May 31 - Disney executives weep after finding they have no
more of Walt’s original intellectual properties to destroy.

---

Well, they still have the reboot of Snow Woke and The 7 Dingalings to look forward to.

Rotflol.

[GreenHornet]

June 22: Michael Moore is diagnosed with an incurable flesh eating virus. Doctors give him 80 years to live.

[Rocky Mountain Wild Turkey]

Just before I attend Holy Mass … I am still really mad at The Babylon Bee.

[Cats1]

LOL... Bookmark

[EvilCapitalist]

As long as they don’t touch Bedknobs and Broomsticks. That was a childhood favorite of mine.

[EvilCapitalist]

I must have missed something. Why would Catholics be so mad at the Babylon Bee?

[clearcarbon]

"March 31 - RFK Jr. orders all future vaccines to be tested on Dr. Anthony Fauci"

...as well as anyone who mandated getting the covid 19 jab.

[IAGeezer912]

February 29: Nancy Pelosi flys back to DC on her broom to vote on Trumps impeachment. She crash lands and breaks her new hip.

[Robwin]

May 1 - The Chicago White Sox are eliminated from playoff contention

I dunno. That one sounds just a bit too optimistic.

[katykelly]

Bfl

[rxh4n1]

“As long as they don’t touch Bedknobs and Broomsticks. That was a childhood favorite of mine.”

I could see them redoing “The Great Locomotive Chase” with carbon neutral locomotives.

[SunkenCiv]

• How My 2024 Predictions Went -- And Some Predictions for 2025 [01/02/2025]page=118#118">Predictions thread for 2025 [vanity free-for-all] [12/30/2024]