Some of us were among those sent to fight America's enemies in Vietnam. I spent many hours on guard duty armed with an M16 and a box of grenades. I had plenty of time to contemplate whether or not I was willing to kill if our enemies attempted to take our position. I do know the answer to that personally.
I was fortunate I think that my resolve was never tested.
I truly appreciate your resolve...I don’t think I would be as conflicted in a similar case. But, if we go to war here, it will be with our neighbors...with Americans. We need to pause and contemplate that seriously.
In a defensive situation I would act to protect my family...no matter how I would feel later. But, it is important to realistically ponder ahead of time what this war would mean.