I learned that lesson too. I was in Dc for about a month and I gave up my seat for a woman who made a snide remark, remained standing and some shifty kid with droopy pants slid into it. After a few more similar incidents and even having someone grab the door from my hands as I was holding it open, I just gave up. Now I just let the door hit them in the face and try to take up two seats on the train. Theo only exception I make is for mothers with little ones. Everyone else gets the gate.
“I just gave up.”
Don’t give up. I always defer to women in public. When they complain I explain that I’m not doing it for them, I’m doing it for me. That usually shuts ‘em up and often gets them to accept the token act in their favor - probably just to spite me for doing something for myself!
I learned that lesson too. I was in Dc for about a month and I gave up my seat for a woman who made a snide remark, remained standing and some shifty kid with droopy pants slid into it. After a few more similar incidents and even having someone grab the door from my hands as I was holding it open, I just gave up.
I’ve had some that would just stand there until I let the door go and it closed. And no more being Mr. Polite Guy in grocery stores. If me and a womyns are approaching an aisle at the the same time, I don’t stop anymore to let them go first. I make sure I go down it first. And if they are chatting and blocking an aisle with their cart despite seeing me coming? I no longer politely ask them to let me through. I just ram their cart with mine and push it aside. Now THAT gets some glares. lol