A big part of it is that women can get as much from a paycheck from the government either through disability (PTSD is a big one), or from having a child and being a single mom. Getting off the dole often results in a loss of benefits, plus (to many others), the loss of freedom that comes from getting your own check, vs relying on your husband to provide.
It’s not even break even that’s the deal, there is a premium being put on getting your crazy check because it means not having someone else in your life telling you what to do, etc.
It’s a terribly lonely way to go. I wish, as a man, that I knew the answer but the answer doesn’t seem to be “ask them to marry you”. So I’m stumped.
Guess I’m just too old fashioned. Not sure how/why marriage, the roles of men and women, and the need for both mothers and fathers got so distorted. There just doesn’t seem to be any “ours” any more.
I am fortunate in that I live on a cul de sac with only 14 houses. Thirteen of the homes are occupied by families with adults in their late 30’s or early 40’s, all the guy have stable jobs, all have at least 2 children. All the women have degrees and could work outside the home but all think raising their children is more important. None have a great deal of money but are so wealthy in so many other ways. Just a real unique situation and, unfortunately, the exception rather than the rule.