Well, at least you're something "useful"...I'm a DOOR of all things! LOL!
You'd be surprised about doors, 'Face. Data abstractions of doors can be amazingly complex. One of my committees (access control) has been debating for months about whether a door can be represented by one object (for pass-through in both directions), or two objects (each representing pass-through in one direction), how to divvy up or share elements such as access control lists (which may be different for different directions, at different times, and under different conditions such as life-safety operations including "fire"), and how to represent many other aspects of access-controlled doors such as "anti-passback," "watchman's tour", access logs, timely response, etc. etc. etc.
See? Being a DOOR is not all that simple!