I'm glad you care for someone, since you claim to prefer having intimate relations with those you hate. Curious..."post coitus animalus tristum est"...but haven't yet explored the tenet of "post coitus Buddhaboy detestum her." Does the disdain (disgust?) appear pre, during, or post? Do you start out with goodwill, only to find that the act itself engenders the hate? I'd bet money on a little "projection" going on.
You could be a good chapter in a psych text.