Secession need not lead to war. History shows your way leads to a bloody revolution. I might be good with that.
The point too many do not understand. Bloody revolutions and bloody civil wars almost always lead to a bloody worse condition than the first, especially those of the last 150 years.
Moreover, secession is a real alternative to the other daily more and more likely alternatives: further and all strangling totalitarianism or bloody revolution. I really don't think the latter is even a possiblity, I don't see it happening, and if it did happen, the end result would likely be just another totalitarian regime since the last 150 years seems to have only resulted in that.