Judge not, lest ye be judged.
And one also has to keep in mind....we are only treated the way we allow people to treat us. My daughter is not being degraded. She has learned to respect people on their merit, and vice versa. Respect is something that is earned, not given on the credit system. How one carries themselves and expresses themselves, whether in a face to face meeting or in written word speaks volumes on their character.
Oh, and to the person that posted about their mother raising 3 kids on her own without having to stoop to the level of a Hooters girl....I am truly happy that everything turned out well for you and your family. My mother raised 5 of us by herself. And no, she was not a stripper. Most mothers do have the “mother bear” gene and always put their kids first. I commend that.
But....as far as my daughter mowing yards, cleaning houses, etc to make some extra cash vs the Hooters thing.... She is displaced is a very large city, far from home where she knows no one. Door to door with a lawn mower is not practical nor is it/was it EVER an option.
First of please don't misquote that verse... It is Judge Not ... ye Hypocrite.. Who is not to judge?.. a Hypocrite... in the same chapter it also tells how a hypocrite is to correct himself to start judging.
Secondly... I know this is dear to your heart... I also pray for your grandbaby and daughter knowing she is in a tough spot right now. You are right to defend her decisions and offer support the best you can. Did you know the angels that watch over babies can even go before God without having to cover their feet and faces... not every angel can do that.
Thirdly.. I came on this thread because it had a lot of posts and I saw that NMH was being targeted somewhat unjustly for daring to rightly call Hooters what is is... it is not called "HOOTERS" for no reason. Having never been to the place, I can only form my opinion of the place as rightfull as I know from articles and pictures I have seen of the place. The women are dressed in a manner to catch the eye of men, that can not be debated. Hooters uses sex to sell and I and a few others dared to point this out. It is not wrong to point this out, now the rest some say is grey area, but God knows no "grey area" that I can see. God does understand the plight of your daughter though.
Fifth, you mention only two solutions for your daughter, one was get a job at Hooters and the other was go on government dole. I pay taxes like everyone here on FR, I can see no better use of my taxes that your daughters plight. At the risk of being tarred and feathered a faux conservative on FR, I would prefer she take the money over Hooters in this case. This is an honest need, and if no other alternative was available (church, home, family) then this is not a prideful decision IMHO...I don't think any FR would have a problem with their taxes going to this real need.. I know from your description that the government help would only be temporary because your daughter's character (as best I can attain from your posts) is solid.
Sixth... you are right that I am an armchair judge.. that is what FR is in case you missed it... but based on what information given me I made my call... it is based on slightly more than "judge not" and is not without limitations of course... but it is there as honestly as I can give it.. Hooters would be a last resort as I previously posted and for the reasons I gave with the knowledge given me in the time spam given. I can not say your daughter did what was right or wrong within her context of circumstances that are given only to her, but I can from the context of what information was given to me on this thread. I know there is privacy issues here and I do not care to dig further in your daughters case because it is private. I do wish you and that precious grand baby a joyous future together if it is the Lord's will. But I can not in good conscious say that I like Hooters and the atmosphere it promotes. I stand by my statement that it would be a last resort job if given any other reasonable choise.
Seventh... I know the lawnmower thing was perhaps out there for you, but I did not mean it as insult. I am proud of my mother doing what she could with what she had, she was a cheerleader (and pretty) and it was perhaps degrading for mom to do it, but she did it without one complaint that I remember. Mom now lives next door to us so we can watch her, we take care of her, seems that she for some reason has had her body fall apart due to a rough life of doing a man's job most her life. Men that don't do their job are a burden for good women it seems. Women that will often do what it takes for their families when men fail, and it is a shame that society is now that way. I pray the Lord has good things in the future for your daughter and her dear precious child.
Lastly... thank you for being up front and honest on this subject... it has been a blessing to me to see a mother that loves her daughter like you do. I commend you for it as honestly as I know how.
Forth... I need to proof read better before posting...
Thank you for your lucid and well thought out post. I have no problem debating an issue but when some posters come at me with personal attacks and an attempt to assassinate my daughter’s character, morals and intellect I just have to shake my head.
No one forces people to patronize Hooters and I understand that it is not everyone’s cup of tea. My original post was just to point out that everyone has a story and all issues should be dealt with on a case by case basis.
The stereotypes that are associated with Hooters girls are easy to understand, but not always the full story.
nmh was weighing in on the worth of ALL people who have ever worked at Hooters. In her view, all are losers regardless of circumstances. That was what got her hammered.
Soeaking of getting govt assistance. I don’t believe that they hand it to you when you walk through the door. Takes time. Meanwhile you have to eat, and pay bills.
You’re saying it all right there. You’ve never even been to a Hooters. They aren’t strip clubs. They’re cheezy little restaurant/bars where the waitresses all wear stupid looking shorts and tight fitting shirts. They also all wear relatively opaque stockings too, kind of like tights. I’ve been to places where waitresses dress skimpier and are a lot better looking. This is just a waitress job, not much different at all than a waitress job at Chili’s or TGI Fridays or something. I’m not suggesting that you go to one of these places, but if you did you’d see that’s it’s not that big of a deal at all. Women go to Hooters all the time if they like the food. I wasn’t at all impressed by the food so I wouldn’t go back.