American Idol shifted away from auditions and into its less popular Hollywood stages Tuesday night, and while the ratings tend to dip during this time, I usually find these rounds to be some of the more interesting. Unlike any other part of the show, we get tension, bickering, and high drama. Usually. Last year's Brittenum twins are still forever complaining in my brain. However, I couldn't help but feel like this part of the process was totally rushed this season. If memory serves me correctly (oh, who am I kidding -- I looked it up), last year, we had one full hour dedicated to the solo Hollywood round and one full hour for the group competition. This time, both phases were hastily crammed together, preventing us from getting to know more "characters" and therefore distancing us from drama. Plus, the judges' commentary was clipped, brief, and forgettable, and besides that, I have lingering questions: what happened to two of the frontrunners from the auditions -- Ebony and Jenry? AND WHERE, GOOD GOD, WAS CAROL BAYER SAGER???As the hour began, we learned that day 1 of the Hollywood rounds would be spent with the girls singing their hearts out. The guys, meanwhile, were off cleaning up litter on the 101 Freeway. Or so I assumed. Unlike last year when we were treated to heartwearming glimpses of people cavorting on the beach, FOX denied us the chance to see "how the other half lived." It was all about the singing. Just the singing.
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We then went to a commercial, and when we returned, Columbian thrush Perla was sauntering off an airplane, arriving in Los Angeles for her big shot at stardom. Proving to be significantly more annoying than her already annoying audition could ever bely, Perla mugged for cameras, acting as if she were the queen of Los Angeles International Airport. Needless to say, the other grouchy travelers were far from impressed.
"I am The Perla!"
Anyway, we then found Perla singing "Hips Don't Lie" -- again -- and even though she was super annoying, the judges still pushed her through (although, not before Simon told her to focus more on singing and less on personality). For whatever reason, this caused Perla to cry, saying, "I can't help but be myself." Yes, your annoying, annoying self....
Baylie Brown, a blondie whose commercial appeal Simon had praised in the auditions, easily glided through to the next round, and she, like Antonella and Jenry, seemed like a sure bet for the top twenty-four. Of course, that's only what I assumed. Little did I realize what adventures lay in store for wee Baylie (and little did I realize that Jenry had disappeared off the face of this Earth).
Sure thing, right?
...Last but not least, there was Nicole Turner. She was the final singer of the day, and even though she had wanted to sing "Tracks of My Tears" to the judges, her mother and aunt pressured her to change tunes. Sure enough, Nicole switched it up at the last second -- a pivotal mistake which cost her her confidence... and her shot to move on. THANKS, MOM. Afterwards, Nicole's mother comforted her, and I couldn't help but feel badly all around. The girl was angry and heartbroken. The mom was immensely guilty. And some sad third thing was probably happening somewhere.
Seeking to right the wrongs, Nicole's mom approached the judges and explained that she had forced her daughter to sing the song and that she deserved a second chance. For whatever reason, this caused Paula to rise to her feet and clap, but I think that's mainly because she thought she saw a monkey riding across the stage on a tricycle.
Anyway, Simon said that it wasn't the song that had cost Nicole her shot, but Nicole and her mom begged to differ. An argument busted out, and soon Nicole was yelling, "It was the delivery of the song!" to which Simon yelled back, "It wasn't the song!" And so on and so forth until finally, the disappointed mother and daughter walked away, and Paula was left to shoot Simon angry looks.
...[Next] was little Matt Satos, the likable sixteen year old kid, who may or may not be very gay. He told us that "Before this, my parents weren't really supportive with the things I did." He then added, "You know, like taking other boys to the dance." Okay, he didn't say that. Instead, he said how the golden ticket to Hollywood had brought about a sense of approval from his parents. He even earned a rare hug from his mom. "I felt loved," he said. It was very sweet. And incredibly, incredibly sad. What is up with these awful parents this year?
Well, Matt had a strong performance, and we knew he was going through thanks to the Multiple Camera Angle theory. Basically, if someone's singing, and the producers dissolve between multiple camera angles, they'll usually move on. I haven't really tested this theory on anyone else (I kind of forgot to), but it seemed reasonable to me.
Anyway, the judges called the latest group of guys out and told some of them to step forward and others to step back. Jarrod [the Reagan Idol] was behind. Matt was forward. Who would move on? Sure enough, the front line got to stay, which meant Jarrod would have to suffice with his lowly Reagan Idol trophy. Afterwards, Matt hugged Jarrod warmly, later asking, "Before you leave, will you tell me more about the Navy?"
Actually, what Matt really did was bust out his pink Razr phone (of course) and call his mom. He informed her that he was moving on and then promptly broke down into tears. Towards the end of the call, she told her son that she loved him, and he then informed us, "She never says she loves me either." That's right: just another superficial parent. As soon as her kid approaches some sort of fame, it's all about the love. Funny how that works.
... since this episode was all about hastiness, we simply moved on, fast forwarding to eleven PM where the groups were now practicing their hearts out for their next big shot. One such group was none other than Baylie, Antonella, and Antonella's less talented friend, Amanda. Based on the audition episodes, I'd say this trio was a powerhouse -- looks, commercial appeal, and talent. (Well, the "talent" label was a bit tenuous for Amanda, but I digress...). Anyway, these girls looked like they could have had the competition wrapped around their finger. Too bad they were consumed with bickering and indecisiveness ...
Later, at the hotel, we met another dysfunctional group containing Gina the dental assistant, two other generic girls, and our old friend Perla. Here's a shocker: Perla had no idea how to sing anything that wasn't "Hips Don't Lie." ...The next morning, Antonella's group had devolved into a total mess ... And where the hell was Jenry? Two weeks ago, there were like three hundred comments on this board and others across the internet from women (and some men) who wanted to do naughty things to the Tyson Beckford lookalike. I picked him to be a top-twelve contender, simply for his looks alone. And yet, he was literally nowhere to be seen in this episode. A little follow-through, please?
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Finally, it was time for Antonella's group to move forward. The girls told us that even if they do get cut, it's okay because they've all become great friends. Yeah, I'm sure Baylie absolutely loves you two.
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Sure enough, Baylie Brown was axed while Amanda miraculously lived to see another day. For now, at least.
Afterwards, Amanda chalked up her success to the big guy upstairs. "Because God likes good people," she said, implying that Baylie might just be an absolutely awful person. Sure enough, the ejected singer got into a minor tiff with the other girls, thus ending the wonderful friendship that had been declared just minutes ago. Oh well.
I think the singers all came out and sang for the judges again, but we really didn't see any of this. We just jumped immediately to the judges separating the kids into three groups, one of which would be going home. Who would be in? Who would be out? All we knew was that Antonella and Amanda were split up. Plus, remember those two Indian kids? The brother and sister? Yeah, well, apparently they had made it this far, and they too were split up. Early predictions: Antonella and the brother were moving on. Amanda and the sister were goners.Well, the judges ambled into room one (which featured Melinda Doolittle) and announced that they'd be moving forward. Of course they would be. They had Melinda Doolittle, one of the best voices in the competition.
