Question: Why are VP Cheney and Ted Kennedy alike?
Answer: They're both called "Dick."
You know, the way to deal with this is to turn it into a political asset: first of course let the guy heal up and get him the best plastic surgeon so he looks fine after he's healed. Then turn this incident into a comedy routine, similar to Johnny Carson and Ed McMahon. These guys could make some great jokes about this incident. Heck, I'll even write a few jokes for them and post them on this thread in a few weeks.