"dehydrate Christians"
If you do so they'll keep for years.
I think Ronco has a machine that does this? Only 4 payments of $29.95....but wait....there's more....
I'm more of a Shrinkwrapian myself. Dehydrated Christians might be good for nature hikes and stuff, but unless they are vacuum sealed, they don't hold well in the freezer...
Thank you for the first chuckle I got out of this sad case.