Herman Cain doesn’t just complain about the weather. He does something about it. When Godfather Pizza was going broke, Herman Cain told the pizza to start tasting better, and it did. Herman Cain is the reason that clouds have silver linings. One day a liberal heckler called Herman Cain’s radio show. His phone melted. Herman Cain knows who let the dogs out, and has punished him appropriately. Herman Cain did not grow up in the south. Herman Cain has always been grown up. One day Superman asked Herman Cain for an autograph, but Herman Cain was too busy saving the...