Wired for Intimacy

overoming-lust.com ^ | March 14, 2014 | Jim Vander Spek

[EscondidoSurfer]

I love the title, Wired for Intimacy. It evocatively describes the promise and hope God packaged with His gift of marriage. Because of the way we are made, husbands can strongly bind with wives (and wives with husbands). The monogamous sexual union is reinforced by the pleasure they share as they are intimate with each other.

As Struthers shows, this is not just an emotional bonding—it involves complex neurological and chemical systems throughout our body. It may be what God was referring to when he declared husband and wife to be “one flesh” (Mark 10:8).

Surveys and studies back this up. Google it yourself to see: Married sex is better....

[EscondidoSurfer]

We are wired for a successful marriage.

[dragonblustar]

It can be pure hell being in a marriage with no intimacy.

[Fast Moving Angel]

We are wired for a successful marriage.

I guess my ex was mis-wired, then.

[GOP Poet]

Interesting website and article about the book. Thanks for posting. Sadly this doesn’t address the sexless marriage phenomenon. But that is more psychological anyway.

[MDLION]

I read elsewhere that it becomes more and more difficult to sustain a marriage when before marriage one has continually formed chemical brain bonds with others through casual sex. When with the body one continually says ‘I commit to you’ while the relationship is shallow, it can screw a person up and result in anger and even rage. Marriage is not impossible for such people though, for all things are possible with God and in Christ people become new creations.

[zerosix]

Many women, especially those over 40, have had their ovaries or adrenal glands removed, their levels of testosterone is either falling or has dropped to such a level their libido has all but disappeared.

I'm hearing a lot if pain in many replies (and presume the responders are male) there is help available.

Treatment isn't cheap as our own FDA first treats testosterone as a dangerous drug and most physicians treat women with falling libido as if it's a normal event to be expected by women yet when it occurs in men, drugs like Viagra are approved in record time (when sudden death from cardiac arrest occurs all too frequently) while the testosterone patch for women was eventually turned down because of "fears of spotty facial hair" in women!

Consequently, most healthcare plans (before Obamacare for certain) would not cover this treatment or pay very little as it us still considered, "experimental," and as such, expensive but the consequences of an "non-intimate" marriage or relationship, is devastating to both parties, children as well if living at home.

Now for some real help for a future of lasting intimacy, bioidentical hormone replacement therapy for both women but also women and a just released book by Kathy C. Maupin, MD, "The Secret Female Hormone, How Testosterone Replacement Can Change Your Life."

If you would like to know more, try www.thesecretfemalehormone.com

I'm not related to Dr. Maupin but know her to be the real deal in experiencing first hand what many women have and are dealing with, resulting in her utilizing her own medical background, to seek treatment for herself and now, thankfully, her scores of patients, who give real life testimonials on her website.

[metmom]

A church in Rochester, NY called The Father’s House, has a great pastor who did a sermon series with his wife on marriage entitled *His & Hers*.

In the last message, which is on intimacy and sex, he addresses the issue of what a promiscuous lifestyle marriage can do to a marriage and how to deal with it. He says that that sin must be repented of and advises people in that situation to ask God to break the soul tie that that premarital sex created with those people they had sex with.

Here’s a link to the messages in their message archive.

His & Hers
http://tfhny.org/media_category/hishers/

[dragonblustar]

I'm hearing a lot if pain in many replies (and presume the responders are male)

Nope. I'm female stuck in a dead relationship.

[zerosix]

Even better, go to the website and/or get the book for lots of information, maybe even some help for you and possibly, your partner.

I'll be thinking and praying for your situation, having been in a similar situation.

[AllAmericanGirl44]

bkmk

[Jack of all Trades]

Yes it can. My sympathies to you. I lived through it for more than 10 years - emotional, physical, communication, affection - you name it. Nothing could budge her to even talk about it or come with me for help. The divorce was final in December of last year. I’m not recommending it, but for me it was the right thing to do.

[Jack of all Trades]

Testosterone is not a panacea for women. Anyone with concerns should go see there doctor, or find a doctor who will consider the whole picture. I know first hand that it can have little or no effect on a woman’s libido, while amplifying emotional swings to the extreme. Not to say that it can’t work well, just that it doesn’t always.

[zerosix]

Of course it (testosterone) is not a panacea for all or even many women.

I do know first hand, however, that there is "testosterone treatment" and there is "testosterone treatment," as I went to three different people claiming to treat my condition and not until seeing my current doctor (the fourth physician), was I given what actually works!

Not stating this is the case for everyone but I did visit medical professionals claiming to treat women with HRT through various means and only when finding the right treatment did I notice any difference at all.