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Pencils, umbrellas, a roll of nickels.

You gotta be creative when you send your little guy into one of our Super Max Government Educational Compounds.

And the greatest weapon is attitude.

Too bad the little guy didn't have a father to teach him how to deal with bullies mentally, not just logistically.

Frowning takes 68 muscles.
Smiling takes 6.
Pulling this trigger takes 2.
I'm lazy.

I'll be honest with you, bullies these days aren't just arseh@les that taunt you and push you around. With some of the things reported coming from the Memphis public schools system, these kids are being beaten half to death, raped, mugged, stabbed, etc. Then there was the not so uncommon case where two sisters were attacked by a mob of about 15 girls and their mothers on the walk home over a....boy.

The Freeper who referred to the SuperMax government compounds....in some cases that is dead on! Our children are sitting next to juvenile felons with records as long as a roll of toilet paper.

I had this issue once with Lurker, Jr. I set up a meeting with the Edu-droids and told them what was going on, who was doing it, and that I expected it to cease immediately.

They patiently explained their 'zero tolerance' policy on violence and told me that while they'd do what they could to stop it if my son fought back he'd be punished, too.

I then explained the Lurker Zero Tolerance Policy. Keep in mind that Lurker, Jr, 13 at the time, was sitting right there.

"My Zero Tolerance Policy regards school officials who after being told that my son is the target of violence do nothing become the targets of large, civil lawsuits both professional and personal. I will also sue the parents of the little rats who are bothering my son."

"Second, if my son is attacked he has my permission to fight back as hard as he can. I spent a lot of money on his Tae Kwan Do lessons and I expect him to leave his attackers needing medical attention. He is to end the attack as quickly as possible using whatever means are required. Is the Lurker Zero Tolerance Policy understood?"

The looks on their faces were absolutely priceless.

The next day I mailed them a Registered letter with a cc to some Lawyer I found in the phone book recapping our conversation and inviting them to correct the record.

The bullying ceased.