A Youth Exodus From Church -- What Are We Doing Wrong?

Agape Press ^ | August 14, 2006 | Matt Friedeman

[Sopater]

In the Fight
A Youth Exodus From Church -- What Are We Doing Wrong?

By Matt Friedeman
August 14, 2006

(AgapePress) - AgapePress has reported that Dr. Frank Page, the new president of the Southern Baptist Convention, is disturbed that many students are leaving the church once they graduate. Indeed, the Convention's Council on Family Life reports that some 88 percent of children from evangelical homes are leaving the church shortly after they graduate from high school.

But why?

I wonder if it is not for these three reasons:

First, we give students what they want, instead of what they need. Some say this is making the gospel relevant to youth. But how relevant is the gospel if, once you are away from your parents, your head has a tough time leaving the pillow for ecclesiastical environs on Sunday mornings? One has to wonder if we have gone too far with age-segregation (which is hardly relevant in the "real" world), catering to perceived needs of teenagers (again, not relevant in later life), and isolating kids in an evangelical subculture (that is laughed at, actually, in "real" life).

Second, when Jesus made disciples of young men (and John was called "a youth and almost a boy" by one early church father), He challenged them to "Follow Me." Teenage discipleship in Jesus' day meant spending time with an adult. Initially, that was with a parent who worked your tail-end off on the farm while talking about Deuteronomy (see Deuteronomy 6:4-9). If you were blessed enough later in life to receive teaching from a rabbi, it meant attaching yourself to the teacher and learning adult lessons with adult methodology. There were no cool websites, lock-ins, hip-hop bands or youth organizations pulling out the stops to come up with neat, new (actually, frequently gross) games to capture attention before a quick three-point Bible study and then pizza.

Third, I wonder if we don't significantly cheat our kids when we suggest that vital discipleship can exist without a life of evangelism and compassionate service. Again, discipleship Jesus-style meant gathering a small group and putting them to communicate the gospel and work among the needy of the community. Together they challenged the lost, touched the sick, healed the lepers, reached out to the hungry and ministered to the poor. In one of his last lessons on earth, Jesus warned His disciples that anyone who wasn't involved in this kind of activity risked "the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels" (Matt. 25:31-46). How is it our youth, and by extension our churches, miss that message? And then, are shocked that our lack of mission fails to capture the imagination of a burgeoning adult making his own time and commitment choices?

Could it be that youth see right through it all? Could it be they know our faith is a farce? Could it be that staying home on Sunday mornings is just as relevant to the Kingdom as attending a church that makes a joke of ministry, specifically youth ministry?

Bless Frank Page for righteous chagrin. Are we evangelicals ready for the tough changes?

---

Matt Friedeman (mfriedeman@wbs.edu) is a professor at Wesley Biblical Seminary. Respond to this column at his blog at "EvangelismToday.blogspot.com."

© 2006 AgapePress all rights reserved.

[Sopater]

Come, you children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of the LORD. -Psalms 34:11

[ladyinred]

One reason I have heard is the the youth want truth, not the God as a genie in a bottle who will give you riches, which so many Churches are advocating now. This is greedy and superficial to teens and young adults these days.

[Sopater]

One reason I have heard is the the youth want truth

Regardless of what the youth want, truth is all that matters. I'm glad that those that are seeking the truth are able to see that. There has been a huge "marketing" push in the church since the turn of the 20th century that has focused on the "desires" of man rather than the "needs" of man. Once we forget who the bible is really about (its not about me), and look for ways to make it say what we want it to say, we loose the true value that is contained in it as the word of God. The bible gives us the basis of who God is and what is truth is, absolutely.

[WhiteGuy]

A Youth Exodus From Church -- What Are We Doing Wrong?


Something my Dad told me when I was a teen, "Those people don't believe in anything that's any fun."

[My2Cents]

Not just youth. People are looking for an authentic encounter with God where Christ is real, not a set of doctrines and traditions of men.

[My2Cents]

On Christless preaching

[Zack Nguyen]

I suspect that churches don't challenge Christians, young or old, with a significant, occasionally even difficult, study of God's Word. They never progress past milk to solid meat. Ministers are wary of confusing the congregation, though I suspect that in many cases it is desire to avoid "controversial" Biblical subjects, and in more than a few circumstances the minister himself (or herself) possesses only a superficial knowledge of Scripture.

We aren't explaining to our young people that their love of Christ and fidelity to a local church is a matter of life and death: of the next generation, of their community, and their nation. Just as importantly it is a matter of pleasing their Savior, who will not make them more like Christ is they spurn the fellowship of the local congregation. This assumes that the youths of which we speak are even truly saved to begin with.

[theFIRMbss]

>What Are We Doing Wrong?

Jack Chick probably
has brought more young folks to Christ
than "mainline" churches.

He's passionate and
he uses media that
convey his passion.

What do "mainlines" do?
Talk at people from pulpits.
(And laugh at people

like Chick who take Christ
and preaching seriously.
Christ needs more Jack Chicks.)

[TommyDale]

You might ask this guy

[Neoliberalnot]

The secular world markets to these kids from every angle and using every medium to draw kids away from church. The number and kind of marketing methods are truly seductive and most youth are captivated by them. Consider what kids are exposed to today and then think back 40-50 years ago for comparison.

[Lee N. Field]

People are looking for an authentic encounter with God where Christ is real, not a set of doctrines

How do you do the first, without saying something true about God (which is to say, doctrine)?

[vladimir998]

I'm sorry, but I think these stories about young people leaving the Protestants sects of the Church are all overblown. First of all, most of them rejoin when they marry and have children. Second, and I know my anecdotal evidence is just that, but I got visit my old Catholic parish last weekend. The Mass is in Latin -- all according to the 1962 Missal. The Church was filled with young people. Young couples in their 20's and 30's with 5 and even 10 kids! One couple I have known since they were high school sweethearts (they're now 27) has 5 kids. Another couple I have known for about 8 years, and I know the wife is only in her mid to late 30's, has 9 kids and is awaiting their 10th!

There are plenty of signs of hope out there. You just have to look for them.

[My2Cents]

You can't. But a great percentage of Christians are satisfied with doctrine, not an encounter with God. Most the religion threads on FR prove that. A.W. Tozer wrote over 50 years ago that "Few attend church with the expectation of meeting God." Things haven't changed.

[conservatative strategery]

I'll tell you why we're losing the youth. Today's gospel is, hey, try Jesus, your life will be better and more fulfilling. While that is true, we leave out that we need Jesus to wash us clean because we are ALL deserving of HELL. Yes, hell fire and brimstone preaching is needed today just as in generations passed. Ray Comfort tells a story of a man on a plane. Someone tells him to put on a parachute (symbolizing Jesus) because it will improve his flight and make him happy. He puts it on, and immediately realizes how uncomfortable he is because the parachute pushed him forward from his seat. People start to make fun of him and laugh at him because he has the parachute on. He becomes angry because he feels he has been lied to: the parachute has NOT improved his flight, in fact, our passenger has become embarrassed and angry. He tears off the parachute and thinks, "that's the last time I try that!". His latter condition is worst than his first. This is how the youth of America is preached to today most of the time. What the passenger NEEDS be told is, the aircraft is going to crash, put on this parachute so that you may live!! Now no matter what happends, our passenger holds onto that parachute tight. When things get tough, he holds on all the more, so that he may live!! This is what our youth needs to hear.

[theFIRMbss]

>People are looking for an authentic encounter with God where Christ is real, not a set of doctrines
>>How do you do the first, without saying something true about God (which is to say, doctrine)?

One way is to trust
the Holy Spirit! Preachers
don't convert people

with "doctrine," logic
and argument! Real preachers
leave conversion to

the Holy Spirit
and simply make it their job
to help people to

open their hearts to
the direct ministrations
the Holy Spirit

offers everyone.
(How many "mainline" preachers
really believe in

the direct, active
involvment of the Spirit
in everyone's life?

I think not many.
I think that's why so many
think that it's their job

doing the Spirit's
work. I think that's why they yell
and perspire so much!)

[gusopol3]

sounds like your dad liked to kid you!

[GSlob]

"This is greedy and superficial to teens and young adults these days."- but so are the teens and young adults [and not only them] - greedy and superficial, superficial and greedy. Thus everything is as it should be - similar dissolves similar, as the alchemists of old used to say.

[WhiteGuy]

sounds like your dad liked to kid you!


No, he was serious.

[Salvation]

Youth are flocking to our church. Catholics have the truth that they so much desire.

[VOA]

bump