Best Lawyer Story Ever!!

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[Neil E. Wright]

Best Lawyer Story Ever!!

This is the best lawyer story of the year, decade and probably the century. A Charlotte, NC, lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, and then insured them against fire among other things. Within a month having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars and without yet having made even his first premium payment on the policy, the lawyer filed a claim against the insurance company. In his claim, the lawyer stated the cigars were lost "in a series of small fires."

The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason: that the man had consumed the cigars in the normal fashion.

The lawyer sued ... and won!

In delivering the ruling the judge agreed with the insurance company that the claim was frivolous.

The Judge stated nevertheless, that the lawyer held a policy from the company in which it had warranted that the cigars were insurable and also guaranteed that it would insure them against fire, without defining what is considered to be unacceptable fire, and was obligated to pay the claim.

Rather than endure a lengthy and costly appeal process, the insurance company accepted the ruling and paid $15,000.00 to the lawyer for his loss of the rare cigars lost in the "fires."

NOW FOR THE BEST PART... After the lawyer cashed the check, the insurance company had him arrested on 24 counts of ARSON!!!! With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case being used against him, the lawyer was convicted of intentionally burning his insured property and was sentenced to 24 months in jail and a $24,000.00 fine.

[Neil E. Wright]

I don't know if this is a true story or not, but if it isn't, it sure SHOULD BE!!! :)

Would that more liars .... er .... Lawyers suffered similar consequences for their actions!!!

±
Toward FREEDOM

[Robert A Cook PE]

A lawyer giveth, and a lawyer taketh away.

But we the taxpayer payeth forever ................ 8<)

[rontorr]

I heard this many, many years ago, and whether it is an actual fact or not is not important, it is typical of the leeches that make their money of of other people's problems

[Neil E. Wright]

a little story to brighten up your weekend..... :)

±

"The Era of Osama lasted about an hour, from the time the first plane hit the tower to the moment the General Militia of Flight 93 reported for duty."
Toward FREEDOM

[Tall_Texan]

It's not the best lawyer story ever. No lawyers died.

[Spiff]

Claim:   A cigar aficionado insures his stogies against fire, then tries to collect from his insurance company after he smokes them.

Status:   False.

Example:   [Collected on the Internet, 1997]

A cigar smoker bought several hundred expensive stogies and had them insured against fire. After he'd smoked them all, he filed a claim, pointing out that the cigars had been destroyed by fire. The company refused to pay, and the man sued. A judge ruled that because the insurance company had agreed to insure against fire, it was legally responsible. So the company paid the claim. And when the man accepted the money, the company had him arrested for arson.

Origins:   This legend began its Internet life after it was posted to the newsgroup alt.smokers.cigars in early 1996, and it has continued to circulate as a "true story" in newsgroups and e-mail ever since, despite its having been identified as an "urban legend" when it was first posted. The version posted was, in fact, nearly identical to one that has been circulating since at least the mid-1960s:

A man bought several boxes of cigars and had them insured against fire. When he had smoked them, he put in a claim against the insurance company that they had been destroyed by fire.

The company refused to pay, and the man sued. The judge ruled that the company had given the man a policy protecting against fire, and must pay.

As soon as the man accepted the money, the company had him arrested on a charge of arson.

Another anecdote from the same 1965 volume suggests this legend stems from a joke whose basic premise has been used in a few different ways:

"He's the kind of accountant you've got to admire. Last year he deducted eighty cartons of cigarettes from my income tax. Called it loss by fire!"

Insurance policies are generally written so that deliberate actions on the part of the policyholders cannot trigger payouts. Furthermore, destroying your own property isn't arson, as long as the act isn't intended to defraud anyone. If a court had already ruled that the insurance company was required to pay, then obviously no fraud was committed, and thus the burning could not be considered arson.

The structure of this legend -- a person's exploiting a regulation for personal gain, then being punished under an unforeseen aspect of that regulation -- is similar to the collegiate legend about cakes and ale.

Last updated:   10 July 2000

The URL for this page is http://www.snopes.com/business/genius/cigarson.htm

Urban Legends Reference Pages © 1995-2003
by Barbara and David P. Mikkelson
This material may not be reproduced without permission

[martin_fierro]

Some sources claim this story is true, but snopes.com debunks it as Urban Legend.

[Neil E. Wright]

Party pooper!!!!! There you go, ruining a good story!!! LOL

±

"The Era of Osama lasted about an hour, from the time the first plane hit the tower to the moment the General Militia of Flight 93 reported for duty."
Toward FREEDOM

[Neil E. Wright]

Well, if you put it that way, I guess you're right!!! Oh well!!!!

±

"The Era of Osama lasted about an hour, from the time the first plane hit the tower to the moment the General Militia of Flight 93 reported for duty."
Toward FREEDOM

[VOA]

Some sources claim this story is true, but snopes.com debunks it as Urban Legend.

There are times when I don't like "snopes.com".

A liberal colleague got an e-mailed copy of the famous Dashcle photo (where he's using
his left hand for the flag salute while Lott and other Senators around him are
using the correct (right) hand. The photo was sent as a taunt by a conserative associate.

I had to bite hard...and tell the truth to my liberal friend...that the photo had been debunked
and showed him the snopes.com info.

Oh well...at least I have the moral high ground of being honest.
Unlike the way my liberal collegue is too much of the time.

[jdontom]

Neil: From fellow officers like myself, and the family of slain Officer David Mobilio our thanks and gratitude go out to you and your family for putting a Name to an unknown killers face, Andrew McCrae, from the officers of Tehama County and the Sacramento CHP your still our FReeper of the Year....

[Chad Fairbanks]

The coolest thing about Urban Legends? They sound so plausible LOL

[SAMWolf]

The stuff dreams are made of, urban legend or not!

Thanks Neil. I can go to bed with a smile.

[meadsjn]

That's almost as old as...

The Marriage Secret

A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary; their domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town. "What a peaceful and loving couple" was an often heard comment when their names came up in conversation.

A local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of their long and happy marriage. "Well, it dates back to our honeymoon," explained the man.

"We visited the Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom of the canyon on pack mules. We hadn't gone too far when my wife's mule stumbled. My wife quietly said, "that's once."

We proceeded a little further and the mule stumbled again. Once more my wife quietly said, "That's twice." We hadn't gone a half-mile when the mule stumbled the third time.

My wife quietly removed a revolver from her purse and shot the mule dead.

I started an angry protest over her treatment of the mule, when she looked at me, and quietly said, "That's once."

And we lived happily ever after...

[WorkingClassFilth]

Heard a variation of that story on an Alfred Hitchcock 33-3/3 rpm album from the early sixties.

Truth is timeless...

[Neil E. Wright]

My priviledge. And pleasure! As a former Okla. Highway Patrolman myself, I feel that if someone is killing cops, they're targeting my brothers and sisters. And I'm NOT gonna sit by and let that happen if I can do something about it.

Some interesting info apparently came out in the preliminary hearing on the 21st. According to my contact who is attending EVERY court appearance in this case. I'll be looking forward to getting the next report after his appearance on June 9th, before Judge Murray.

You guys be careful out there!

±

"The Era of Osama lasted about an hour, from the time the first plane hit the tower to the moment the General Militia of Flight 93 reported for duty."
Toward FREEDOM

[PistolPaknMama]

A lawyer giveth, and a lawyer taketh away. But we the taxpayer payeth forever

It's too bad that some lawyers give all lawyers a bad name. My fiance is a lawyer - and he pays taxes too. He's also a FReeper. He defends 1st and 2nd amendment rights, for free a lot of times. We have two abortion protest cases we've not charged for because the people can't afford a lawyer. We also have a federal 1st amendment case, and he's vounteered to assist on a 2nd amendment appeal for nothing. If there weren't lawyers like him, these people would have nowhere to turn and government really would run amock.

I won't argue that there are weasels out there, but there are more out there than you obviously know about who take their duty to defend seriously.

[woofer]

It's not the best lawyer story ever. No lawyers died.

Not that I agree with your sentiments expressed herewith and hereto at the terminus of your declaration, but perhaps a story of the nature that I will postulate as an amicus will brighten your day.

A bus full of Lawyers were traveling down the coastal highway, when suddenly, the bus veered and caromed over the edge, crashing to the rocks and surf far below, killing all but one aboard. What would you call this accident?

A good start.

But it gets better. The lone survivor, as he flailed about in the raging surf, was suddenly pulled under and out to sea. A bull Great White Shark appeared, charging directly at the attorney, jaws agape and murder in its eyes. Abruptly the shark pulled up on its attack and brushed by the attorney. Confused, yet grateful he hadn't been devoured by the shark, the attorney asked the almost felonious fish why he had been spared. The shark grinned at him, winked and turned to leave the scene. Glancing back at the stunned lawyer, the shark said:

"Professional courtesy."

[f.Christian]

In a medical research laboratory ...

they had to switch from little rats to the big ones --- liberals // devilcRats (( LAWYERS )) ...

because ...

they couldn't get attached to the big ones ---

and there were some things the little one's wouldn't do !

[redheadtoo]

I recall reading the cakes and ale story in a Reader's Digest Book that published years of their best humor. My own favorite Urban Legend is one that is local to my home in southern California.

During California's fire season aircraft, known as Super Scoopers, collect large quantities of ocean water and dump them on brush fires. This legend has to do with these planes.

According to the legend a brush fire had burned a neighborhood to the ground. When the fire was finally out a body was found in one of the burned out houses. But, to everyone's surprise the body was wearing full scuba gear. The autopsy showed that the man had not died in the fire but had died from extreme body trauma.

When the man was finally identified his family said that he had gone scuba diving the day he disappeared. The coroner concluded that the man had been in the ocean when the Super Scooper airplane had swooped down to fill its water tanks had sucked up also. When the plane dropped its water on the fire the scuba diver had been dumped also.

What makes this story really funny was that the first time I heard it was when my gullible step-sister was telling it as a true story to my step-mother and her sister in law. The three of them believed every word of it until I started laughing at them.