Posted on 03/18/2015 9:57:43 AM PDT by ilovesarah2012
That's the question the family and friends of Air Force Reserve Capt. Jamie Brunette are struggling to answer. At 30, Brunette seemingly had it all. A vivacious and attractive athlete and scholar, she had been lauded by the Air Force for her work in Afghanistan, was a partner in a fitness center about to open in Largo and was known by her family and friends as being the strong one always ready to help others. But for some reason, Brunette, who left active duty after 11 years last June and joined the Air Force Reserve, couldn't help herself. On Feb. 9, Tampa police found her slumped over in the back of her locked Chrysler 200 sedan outside a Harbour Island cafe near her apartment. Police say it appears she killed herself with her Smith & Wesson .380 handgun, which she purchased about six months earlier. Now family and friends are trying to come to grips with the pain behind Brunette's effervescent smile that caused her to become one of the 22 veterans a day who take their own lives, according to a 2012 Department of Veterans Affairs study. It's a problem that's vexing both the military and the VA, which are struggling to find ways to prevent suicides.
(Excerpt) Read more at military.com ...
Lots of people feel they have no way out and selfishly kill themselves and ruin the rest of the families lives forever.
Nothing but tragic. Doesn’t speak well for the effectiveness of the wingman training we all have to take every year, that’s supposed to prevent this sort of thing. RIP, Captain.
Colonel, USAFR
Thoughts and prayers for the family in this time of grieving.
So beautiful and smart. So sad she felt she had no options. Was she sexually assaulted in Afghanistan? Who knows? But according to the article,
“According to a study published this month in the medical journal Annals of Epidemiology, the nearly 1.3 million veterans of the wars in Afghanistan andIraq between 2001 and 2007 had a 41 percent to 61 percent higher risk of suicide than the general population, with 1,868 committing suicide during that time period. And while female veterans were far less likely than men to commit suicide, when compared to those who never served, female veterans were more likely to commit suicide than male veterans.”
The war doesn’t end even after they are home.
Wisconsin PING
RIP, Capt!
But, to the people speculating that this was the result of some internalization of a sexual assault, SHAME ON YOU! Instead of looking at everything in this woman’s life which could have played into her downward spiral, you are trying to tie this to the easiest and most political point you can find - with no proof!
If you really want to make her life and death mean something, don’t start throwing out excuses and innuendo - that is just sad, lazy, and pointless!
There are more people out there with bipolar disorder than we realize. My late wife was affected and was a very positive vivacious person and in a bout of depression took her life. She was 34 at the time. There were many other contributing factors with antidepressants and diet medications but overall it was the bipolar disorder that created the situation. There is usually more than one contributing factor for the cause and no single item to blame.
As a veteran, I can speak about the life changes that you experience when returning to the civilian-puke world.
One, there is very little system, rigor, and structure in the civilian world. This is confusing and often very hard to return to for veterans.
Two, there is trust in the military, because you MUST trust. In the civilian world, there is speculation and distrust in every single thing you do and every where you work. Again, this is confusing to veterans and often makes them angry (i.e., we get labeled as crazy, rigid, uptight, etc...).
Three, there are many civilians who openly and angrily HATE military people. They show it, they say it, and they live it. This is confusing and disheartening, and again leads to the veteran being angry...see above.
Four, when you have these confusions and internal discussions, you start to self-doubt and think maybe it is just ME - obviously it is just me, because there are lots of veterans who make it in the civilian world. This causes you to continue to internalize your PERFECTLY, REASONABLE CONCERNS, but you don’t want to mention them, because you are feeling unsure about these other people.
Five, you are used to being a part of a team with common goals and common morals and camaraderie. Every one of those items are EXPLICITLY missing in the most of the civilian world. It is all about me, Me, and ME! Again, this makes the veteran pine for the “good ole’ days” which, honestly were NOT always that good, but were more understandable than your current path.
These are all things which I personally felt, and I am sure there are other things which cause veterans to feel that the only way to end the confusion and pain is through suicide.
If you are out there, and you have these feelings, or you have friends or family who are having these concerns, please get them in tough with me! Suicide is NOT the answer!
Mark Reece
Sergeant - USMC (85-94)
I agree, the fact that she was in a crazy relationship with a bad boy for 5-6 months, which ended just two weeks before her suicide, seems like a far more credible cause to me.
People really don't understand PTSD. They think a person should just "get over it". But they can't every time they close their eyes, smells, sights, sounds, they are hypervigilent.
It is often like having a lightening fast flood of images screaming through your head night and day. They are afraid to sleep, to feel, to talk.
Well stated.
Thanks for the run down. It is helpful for seeing how those things you list look hopeless and unchangeable. I usually say suicide is a failure of imagination for ways to change a life, but with your list it is easy to see there aren’t clear or easy ways to inject those things back into post military life.
This subject is interesting to me personally. A few years ago an AF major friend of mine shot himself and my wife and I were possibly the last to see him alive. It has left me with unresolved questions and feelings. I was a military brat growing up but despite all the proximity you don’t get the full understanding of the mentality/emotions. Your post was actually small help in that area, so thank you.
Her suicide was not the result of her service. It was the result of a crime committed against her. Big difference.
How can someone who cannot protect themselves against assault and deal with it appropriately be trusted with the defense and protection of a nation? Sad, though this is, sending women into combat is ineffective and inappropriate.
That was my thought. Women do not belong with men in the military. Call me sexist, but that is my opinion.
Her sister made the sexual assault accusation. I just found it strange she was found in the back seat of her car. Do people who are going to kill themselves in their cars usually climb in the back seat to do it?
OK. You’re sexist, but you’re right.
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