Posted on 02/21/2015 5:01:59 AM PST by Kaslin
Editor's note: The following is an adapted transcript from “The Flipside with Michael Loftus,” a new comedy show that’s debuted on TV stations across America.
You know what I did? I invented an app for your phone. Now here’s what you do when inventing an app, you look around and try to figure out what everybody needs; so I’m watching the news, turns out everybody’s getting killed by cops. So everybody’s gonna need my new App, “Michael Loftus’ How Not to Get Killed by the Cops.”
It’s super easy; you just press a button and it tells you what to do. Let’s try it. Here we go, How Not to get Killed by the Cops:
"Don’t do anything that would make a policeman want to kill you.” ...and done.
It seems pretty simple doesn’t it?
I think I’m gonna sell a bunch of these things! Because the streets are crowded with people who seem not to understand that if you wrestle with a policeman for his gun there’s a really good chance he will shoot you. You know what cops really don’t like? When you wrestle ’em; that tends to make ’em a little uptight.
Imagine the defense line: “Your Honor, all I was doing was wrestling the cop for his gun. I didn’t think he was gonna shoot me, yeah, that’s why I’m suing. I think I should have a reasonable expectation to grapple with the officer to get his weapon and not get shot.”
There’s been a lot of statistics flying around recently and I guess a couple hundred people are shot by the cops every year. And you know what I think? That number is crazy low.
Do you know policemen do? Do you know what the job description is for what they do? If there’s an explosion or a crazy person in the street with a baseball bat or gunshots going off, the police have to stop what they’re doing and head towards the violence. Every other sane person on the planet would be like, “Holy crap, those guys are shooting, let’s go hide over there.”
While the police have to go in, take control over the situation and make sure every law-abiding citizen is safe.
Okay so now imagine you’re the cop. You’re all by yourself, you’re in a dark alley and all you know is the suspect is supposed to be around here somewhere and armed and dangerous and he’s in the area. All the sudden the trashcan gets knocked over, you see movement, it’s comin’ atcha and it’s got a gun so if it’s me, I’m gonna BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! Sure I just killed a cat, but it had a rifle!
It’s a dangerous job. And the situation changes in the blink of an eye. We’ve all seen the show “Cops,” that was great. Some cop would have to go to some drunk hillbilly’s house, he’s fighting with his wife, she’s fighting with him. Then all the sudden she’s got a knife and she’s trying to kill somebody. How’d that happen? I don’t know but now the cop is in a fight for his life.
Thank God they’re out there protecting and serving. Because you know what they’re protecting? Our lives and our stuff. You like your neighborhood? Me too. Now close your eyes and imagine it without cops. It looks the same except now it’s on fire!
Now I’ll tell you this; if there were roving bands of cops randomly hunting down and killing people, I would protest that like you’ve never seen a protest. Of course I wouldn’t be at the front because if the cops are randomly hunting down and killing people and I’d get shot so I’d probably be standing behind my buddy Jeff using him as a human shield; but you’d hear me, I’d be chanting.
So here’s the deal...We need the police, they keep us safe and it’s a very, very, very tough job. And if you don’t want to get in trouble with the police, don’t give them a reason. I thought this was like basic knowledge, but nowadays I guess you need an app for your phone to understand it. I have been afraid of the police a handful of times in my life. Every single time it was because I knew I was doing something wrong that I could get in trouble for.
You know what I’m talking about...You’re doing 75 in a 55 mph zone and then you see the cop and you know he saw you and you get that knot in your stomach, your butt gets all clenchy, then you see the lights in the rearview, then you hear that noise “woo” nobody likes that noise, “woo.” Then you pull over and you wait for the cop with your hands on the steering wheel at 10 and 2 because you’re busted.
Now there’s a bunch of things you don’t wanna do when the cop shows up at the driver’s side window: Don’t crank up the radio and tell the cop to wait for a second because this is your favorite song, and don’t tell him to go stop a real crime because that’s what he just did, and lastly, don’t wrestle him because he will shoot you. I know that’s a lot to remember, so you probably wanna go to the app store and download my new app “How to not get Killed by a Cop.”
I’m looking forward to all that money, thank you very much.
LE is under no legal obligation to do any of this, except to the extent their duty to enforce laws results in it.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/1976377/posts
Gee, I could write an app or two myself:
“How not to get your dog shot in his own backyard by the police.”
“How not to get your cat stomped on by the police.”
“How not to get your baby flash-bang-grenaded by the police.”
Look, I know for the most part a lot of good cops are just doing their job. But it has been getting really bad lately. Why?
Because the police are the line of contact between the citizenry and the laws the goverment makes. And they will take the approach and personality the government that put them there wants them to take.
Think about that for a minute. If you are a law abiding citizen like me, and are still worried the cops are going to kill you (again like me, because I carry concealed, and the government the cops represent doesn’t like that), then the government has won. I am no longer a free man.
Shaking my head in disgust at what this country has become.
Police get a deserved bad rap because they no longer represent and protect the community. Today they are militarized, they bully, and act as if they make the laws, that we are subjects, not fellow citizens. They have forgotten that they work for us.
My dad was a police officer while I grew up. Most of our family friends were police. While I had mixed thoughts on them then, I definitely do not now think they deserve much respect. They are simply too often out-of-control public employees, nothing more, nothing less.
AFAIK, at home the only time I’d call the police is afterwards when they’d need to be the ones to call a coroner. The ones in my area are okay because it’s a small population county and everybody grew up together. But I still wouldn’t rely on them to protect me or my stuff.
I was sitting on my porch one day and a whole bunch of city cops and Sheriff’s Deputies were walking around and peering into cars and knocking on doors. I sat there until a deputy came up to the porch and said there had been some car break ins and they were getting around to tell everyone about it and to BOLO. He said be careful, because they might try to enter homes. I just kinda laughed and told him that sure would be the last mistake they every made - I’m never more than a second or so away from a gun. He just laughed and said have a good day.
Problem is it doesn't seem to take much for the police to want to kill you these days.
Hmm, like sitting in your living room getting swatted with a no knock warrant because a lying druggie informant who wanted to stay out of jail said you were growing pot, while the police are eager to get that cash from the federales for pot arrests? Facts be damned.
See, we gotta stop being so antagonistic towards our LE who are just trying to earn a little extra in federal grants. They're just innocent pawns.
I guess the thought that if Wilson simply wanted to shoot Brown for no reason other than that Brown was black, he could have just cruised up to Brown, opened his window, and pumped a bunch of bullets into Brown without having to pull Brown into his car to shoot him never occurred to the Brown mourners.
Maybe that's a new police technique I never heard of. Roll down the window and pull the suspect into your car without getting out of the car to handcuff the suspect. I guess it must be a lot easier to pull a huge suspect like Brown through the window and have him be able to grab for your gun. (snicker)
If only that were true. Police exist to enforce the orders of the Rulers. If the Rulers want a system of fair and just laws, the Police will protect and serve.
If the Rulers want to indulge themselves in totalitarian control over the population, the Police will behave accordingly.
What kind of political elites do you think we have now?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QR465HoCWFQ
Chris Rock and “How Not To Get Your Ass Kicked by the Police.” Language warning.
Gonna have to try that! That is when I am not driving around looking for dogs to shoot.
The problem there is the mentality/thinking process of LE that sees these actions as acceptable is endemic in the upper levels of LE. It has become part of LE culture where management is concerned.
One state is considering law that would reign in no knock warrants (not eliminate them) and you should see and hear the wailing from police chiefs. They want NO restrictions on them. They consider dead (innocent included) civilians to be acceptable collateral damage. And they say so in so many words.
80,000 SWAT invasions a year. At least 80% of those are to serve piddly sh1t warrants.
The problem now is that these invasions are considered by police leadership to be acceptable standard practice. IOW, it is now permanently ingrained in their thinking and their culture. Business as usual.
Ask yourself, what would it take to put a halt to this? Is it even possible to change their way of thinking? Truthfully, in the long run I see a completely cowed population or the other extreme of a violent backlash by normal citizens.
Sometimes it's just a neighbor with a hair across his ass...
I suppose that if there were a carefully orchestrated plan to SWAT prominent local liberals everywhere, that we’d see some real outcry against the practice.
Maybe targeting known liberal activist judges. Some of them would sing a different tune if they had their door smashed in during the night and learned the justification was an anonymous phone call.
See, we gotta stop being so antagonistic towards our LE who are just trying to earn a little extra in federal grants. They're just innocent pawns.
Well said.
the police have to stop what they’re doing and head towards the violence. Every other sane person on the planet would be like, “Holy crap, those guys are shooting, let’s go hide over there.”
While the police have to go in, take control over the situation and make sure every law-abiding citizen is safe.
*****************
I used to think the same thing. Columbine taught me different.
Now they wait outside hiding behind their cars while people bleed to death. Only when the shooting stops will they heroically charge in and “take control of the situation”.
After all, the most important thing it that “every officer make it home safely”.
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