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Police: Nude Chase Bank VP Jumps From Woods At Woman
WNBC ^
| May 27, 2005
| wnbc
Posted on 05/27/2005 7:40:14 AM PDT by holymoly
UNION BEACH, N.J. -- Monmouth County authorities said a nude banker wearing a condom jumped out of the woods and tried to sexually assault an off-duty female police officer who was out for a jog.
The woman grabbed a can of pepper spray and called police on her cell phone as she chased the man in Union Beach on Sunday. Authorities said the woman got the license plate number to a rental car, which authorities traced to John Kelly.
The 39-year-old surrendered to police Thursday. Officials said the Jersey City resident is a vice president for Chase in New York.
Kelly was charged with attempted sexual assault and lewdness. Prosecutors would not release the female officer's name or say what department she works for.
TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; News/Current Events; US: New Jersey
KEYWORDS: assault; attempted; bank; cop; jogger; jpmorganchase; leo; nutcase; police; rapist; sexoffender; vicepresident; vp; woman
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...a nude banker wearing a condom...Well, at least he was practicing "safe sex". ;)
1
posted on
05/27/2005 7:40:17 AM PDT
by
holymoly
To: holymoly
2
posted on
05/27/2005 7:41:29 AM PDT
by
Dallas59
(" I have a great team that is going to beat George W. Bush" John Kerry -2004)
To: holymoly
At least now the banksters are protecting themselves when they screw you.
3
posted on
05/27/2005 7:41:35 AM PDT
by
agitator
(...And that no man might buy or sell, save he that had the mark)
To: holymoly
Whoa! Why didn't he just call a hooker like the bankers do? This is a strange story.
4
posted on
05/27/2005 7:42:04 AM PDT
by
Jaysun
(No matter how hot she is, some man, somewhere, is tired of her sh*t)
To: Dallas59
5
posted on
05/27/2005 7:42:29 AM PDT
by
AdamSelene235
(Truth has become so rare and precious she is always attended to by a bodyguard of lies.)
To: holymoly
If the horny banker had jumped out at a man, the MSM would claim it was just an "alternative lifestyle" to be taught to kids in elementary school.
6
posted on
05/27/2005 7:42:34 AM PDT
by
mikegi
To: holymoly
"Penalty for early withdrawal"
7
posted on
05/27/2005 7:42:34 AM PDT
by
theDentist
(The Dems are putting all their eggs in one basket-case: Howard "Belltower" Dean.)
To: holymoly
Added to Dem talking points as another example of how big business is raping us.
8
posted on
05/27/2005 7:42:36 AM PDT
by
soloNYer
(McCain's Moderates= people who don't even know who their OWN senators are.)
To: Jaysun
Whoa! Why didn't he just call a hooker like the other bankers do? This is a strange story.
9
posted on
05/27/2005 7:42:37 AM PDT
by
Jaysun
(No matter how hot she is, some man, somewhere, is tired of her sh*t)
To: holymoly
Ok is it april 1st??? How sad a idiot with so much money can't just get a prostitute.
10
posted on
05/27/2005 7:42:59 AM PDT
by
1FASTGLOCK45
(FreeRepublic: More fun than watching Dem'Rats drown like Turkeys in the rain! ! !)
To: holymoly
Well you know those bankers, they know there will be a penalty for early withdrawal.
BTW, is that not the most awkward headline??
11
posted on
05/27/2005 7:43:09 AM PDT
by
Millee
(So you're a feminist......isn't that cute??)
To: holymoly
a nude banker wearing a condom jumped out of the woods and tried to sexually assault an off-duty female police officer who was out for a jog."Here at Chase Manhattan: we're all about people." :)
12
posted on
05/27/2005 7:43:32 AM PDT
by
KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle
("As a conservative site, Free Republic is pro-G-d, PRO-LIFE..." -- FR founder Jim Robinson)
To: holymoly
a nude banker wearing a condom jumped out of the woodsHis definition of a "woody"?
13
posted on
05/27/2005 7:44:10 AM PDT
by
b4its2late
(It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.)
To: holymoly
Gives new meaning to "Chase" Banker! (Sorry, couldn't help myself)
14
posted on
05/27/2005 7:44:11 AM PDT
by
ssaftler
(Screw politics, it's baseball season!!!)
To: holymoly
Must have been one of those old BankOne excutives!!
To: holymoly
VP with Chase Bank? Not for long, er, much longer, er, not now. There! Got 'er done!
16
posted on
05/27/2005 7:45:09 AM PDT
by
RexBeach
("Anyone can see what's wrong, but can you see what's right?" -Winston Churchill)
To: holymoly
He sounds more "nekkid" than naked..
To: Millee
BTW, is that not the most awkward headline?? So many things to cram into so small a space. At least you have to admire the headline writer for getting so many of the five W's into it.
18
posted on
05/27/2005 7:45:59 AM PDT
by
Cicero
(Marcus Tullius)
To: TexasCajun
Must have been one of those old BankOne excutives!!The title "VP" in a bank doesn't mean much. Line managers were VPs at Bank One.
19
posted on
05/27/2005 7:46:12 AM PDT
by
dirtboy
(Drooling moron since 1998...)
To: holymoly
Before you attack her,
Cover your whacker.
20
posted on
05/27/2005 7:46:56 AM PDT
by
Slicksadick
(Go out on a limb........Its where the fruit is.)
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