Posted on 02/02/2018 12:19:11 PM PST by sodpoodle
A cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates.
“Have you ever done anything of particular merit?”, St. Peter asked.
“Well, I can think of one thing,” the cowboy offered.
”On a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota, I came upon a gang of bikers who were threatening a young woman.
I directed them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen. So, I approached the largest and most tattooed biker and smacked him in the face, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the ground. I yelled, ‘Now, back off or I'll kick the @#$% out of all of you!’ ”
St Peter was impressed, ”When did this happen? ”
”Couple of minutes ago. ”
Going camping is a great way to get away from it all.
Leave the devices at home.
in fact, james comey is slated to take a trip to fort marcy park real soon.
Sent that joke to my entire mailing list.;-)
Good one........... LOL
Good one! Thanks.
So ready for that break you offered. (Funny, too.)
I guess I feel the “after party” collapse, following all the weeks of political edge, HYPE, expectations, noise and chaos.
Thanks.
That’s a good one.
Thanks Sod, what a great way to end the week. With a laugh.
Thanks. Needed that.
“A man’s got to know his limitations.” - Detective Sgt Callahan
That was REALLY good!!
Cinderella is now 95 years old.
After a fulfilling life with the now dead prince,
she happily sits upon her rocking chair, watching
the world go by from her front porch, with a cat
named Bob for companionship.
One sunny afternoon out of nowhere, appeared the
fairy godmother.
Cinderella said, ‘Fairy Godmother, what are you
doing here after all these years’?
The fairy godmother replied, ‘Cinderella, you have
lived an exemplary life since I last saw you. Is there
anything for which your heart still yearns?’
Cinderella was taken aback, overjoyed, and after some thoughtful consideration, she uttered her first wish:
‘The prince was wonderful, but not much of an investor.
I’m living hand to mouth on my disability cheques, and I wish I were wealthy beyond comprehension.
Instantly her rocking chair turned into solid gold.
Cinderella said, ‘Ooh, thank you, Fairy Godmother’
The fairy godmother replied, ‘It is the least that I can do.
What do you want for your second wish?’
Cinderella looked down at her frail body, and said,
‘I wish I were young and full of the beauty and youth I once had.’
At once, her wish became reality, and her beautiful
young visage returned. Cinderella felt stirrings inside her that had been dormant for years.
And then the fairy godmother spoke once more:
‘You have one more wish; what shall it be?’
Cinderella looks over to the frightened cat in the corner and says,
‘I wish for you to transform Bob, my old cat, into a kind and handsome young man.’
Magically, Bob suddenly underwent so fundamental a change in his biological make-up that, when he stood before her, he was a man so beautiful the likes of him neither she nor the world had ever seen.
The fairy godmother said, ‘Congratulations, Cinderella, enjoy your new life.’
With a blazing shock of bright blue electricity, the fairy godmother was gone as suddenly as she appeared.
For a few eerie moments, Bob and Cinderella looked into each other’s eyes.
Cinderella sat, breathless, gazing at the most beautiful, stunningly perfect man she had ever seen.
Then Bob walked over to Cinderella, who sat transfixed in her rocking chair, & held her close in his young muscular arms.
He leaned in close, blowing her golden hair with his warm breath as he whispered...
‘Bet you’re sorry now that you cut my nuts off’
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