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If Vince Foster Had Had a Gun, He'd Be Alive Today
TruTV ^ | 2013 | Matthew MacAdams

Posted on 01/13/2013 6:58:41 AM PST by Lonesome in Massachussets


(Excerpt) Read more at trutv.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; History; Humor; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: arkanside; guncontrol; sandyhookpolitics; secondamendment; vincefoster
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Give me the gun, Vince.
1 posted on 01/13/2013 6:58:48 AM PST by Lonesome in Massachussets
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets

If airline passengers had been armed there wouldn’t have been a 9/11. If islamics knew we would be armed in places where they wanted to attack us they might fade away.


2 posted on 01/13/2013 7:01:59 AM PST by IbJensen (Liberals are like Slinkies, good for nothing, but you smile as you push them down the stairs.)
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets

Poor Vince. He trusted Mrs. Clinton.

He ate a gourmet meal and drank vintage wine in her tony Georgetown residence then was surprised when she shot him. He was then ignominously rolled up in a carpet and transported to Marcy Park for the government to worry about.

The most important thing that clueless voters from Arkansas, New Yarkansas and the Peoples Republic of America forget is the pile of bodies that this star-crossed couple have left in their wake enroute to power and enormous wealth.

They did what a couple with similar scruples did in the 1930’s: robbed, murdered and rarely enjoyed sex with one another.


3 posted on 01/13/2013 7:08:27 AM PST by IbJensen (Liberals are like Slinkies, good for nothing, but you smile as you push them down the stairs.)
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To: IbJensen
If islamics knew we would be armed in places where they wanted to attack us they might fade away.
Like the Japanese kamikazes of WWII, most terrorist attacks are suicide missions.
They'll never "fade away" and the only way to stop them is to kill them before they act.
4 posted on 01/13/2013 7:12:57 AM PST by oh8eleven (RVN '67-'68)
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To: IbJensen

For some reason, I was selected for “random screening” at Logan very early one morning. I had just gotten back from Logan at about 11:00 pm the previous evening and was tired and visibly annoyed. The TSA hack who was frisking me told me that they had found a “gentleman with a 9 mm” only a few days previous. “Now what does a gentleman need with a 9mm?” he asked, rhetorically. It took all my restraint not to reply, “Maybe if a few gentleman departing from this airport on 911 had had 9mm’s hacks like you wouldn’t have jobs.”


5 posted on 01/13/2013 7:13:00 AM PST by Lonesome in Massachussets (Obama: Brought to you by the letter "O" and the number 16 trillion.)
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets

Of course Vince Foster had a gun!

Somebody pushed it into his cold dead fingers & stuck the thumb into the trigger guard & then took a nice closeup photo.

Nothing to see here, folks, so just move on.


6 posted on 01/13/2013 7:27:22 AM PST by elcid1970 ("The Second Amendment is more important than Islam.")
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To: oh8eleven

The individual Japanese who decided to promote suicide attacks were not the same Japanese who carried them out, for the most part. When you study the Japanese tactics at Guadalcanal, and elsewhere in the Pacific, they were little different that suicide attacks. It was their hope that the Americans would become discouraged and leaved. Worked in Iraq, and it’s working in Afghanistan.


7 posted on 01/13/2013 7:31:56 AM PST by Lonesome in Massachussets (Obama: Brought to you by the letter "O" and the number 16 trillion.)
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets

I wish you would have, although the comment would have fallen on ears of a low IQ mental dwarf.

I get into everytime I fly due to the fact that I have a shoulder and knee replacement and they treat me with the utmost disrespect!


8 posted on 01/13/2013 7:35:45 AM PST by IbJensen (Liberals are like Slinkies, good for nothing, but you smile as you push them down the stairs.)
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To: oh8eleven

We need to shove them out of our nation and under a proper, patriotic regime that would place our safety first, that would happen. Our borders would be closed and the taco eaters would have to go back to the paradise known as Mexico.


9 posted on 01/13/2013 7:37:36 AM PST by IbJensen (Liberals are like Slinkies, good for nothing, but you smile as you push them down the stairs.)
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To: IbJensen

I didn’t want a full body cavity search, and I had to be somewhere for business and he had nothing else to do. He was holding all the cards, and knew it.

I remember flying in and out of Heathrow in 1991 and still think British airport security in 1991 was better and more more humane than Logan 2002. It’s only got worse.


10 posted on 01/13/2013 7:41:29 AM PST by Lonesome in Massachussets (Obama: Brought to you by the letter "O" and the number 16 trillion.)
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets

Flying out of the USA on a reputable foreign airline and return is always more enjoyable than the ridiculous frisking, patting, groping and X-raying our bodies for the later private enjoyment of the gouls who work for the lusty lesbian.


11 posted on 01/13/2013 8:14:52 AM PST by IbJensen (Liberals are like Slinkies, good for nothing, but you smile as you push them down the stairs.)
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets
When you study the Japanese tactics at Guadalcanal, and elsewhere in the Pacific, they were little different that suicide attacks. It was their hope that the Americans would become discouraged and leaved.
I'm the son of a WWII Marine and a former Marine, VN vet. I know all about the Pacific.
The Japanese soldiers fought under the code of Bushido, not the same as the suicide pact sworn to by the Divine Wind pilots.
Japanese Army didn't fight a war to "discourage" the US from staying in. They fought a war to defeat the US, as did their Axis allies. Period.
12 posted on 01/13/2013 8:16:04 AM PST by oh8eleven (RVN '67-'68)
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets

COLUMBO: CASE OF THE FOSTER “SUICIDE”
by P. J. Gladnick


(President Clinton is sitting at his desk in the Oval Office. A voice is heard on his intercom. It is his secretary.)

SECRETARY: Mr. President, Lieutenant Columbo is here to see you.

(The Oval Office door opens a bit. Columbo peeks in tentatively.)

COLUMBO: I hope I’m not disturbing you, Mr. President.

CLINTON (smiling broadly): Not at all! I heard that you were visiting the White House. That’s why I had my people take you off the tour line to see me. I’ve always been a big fan of yours.

(Columbo, puffing on a cigar and wearing a wrinkled raincoat, walks in a slouching manner up to Clinton. A beaming Clinton stands up from behind his desk and heartily shakes Columbo’s hand.)

COLUMBO: Mr. President, this is indeed an honor. Let me tell you, my wife is a big fan of yours. Sir, I don’t mean to impose but do you think you can autograph a photo for my wife?

CLINTON: Heck, that’s no problem. I’ll be happy to oblige.

(Clinton pulls a photo of himself from his desk, signs it, and hands it to Columbo.)

COLUMBO: This is terrific! You don’t know what this will mean to my wife_..Uhh, before I go, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?

CLINTON: Huh? Okay, sure.

COLUMBO: Could you tell me how much you paid for your suit? I really admire the material.

CLINTON: I, umm, think it cost about $500.

COLUMBO: And so clean too. With a suit like that you must send it out to the cleaners after each time you wear it.

CLINTON: Of course.

COLUMBO: Well, this is what’s bothering me. I heard that your good friend, the late Vincent Foster, was also a nice dresser yet there were carpet fibers discovered all over his suit when they found him after his tragic suicide in Fort Marcy Park.

(Clinton’s smile turns a bit tense.)

CLINTON: So?

COLUMBO: So it seems like a mystery how all these fibers ended up on his suit. You might pick up a few carpet fibers around the bottom of the pants but not all over the suit.

CLINTON: I think the FBI determined that the carpet fibers probably came from his home.

COLUMBO: That is only an assumption because the FBI never actually took samples from the carpet fibers at his home. With all those fibers on his suit, you would think that they would make a comparison.

CLINTON (Slightly exasperated): Look, Lieutenant Columbo, there have already been three investigations into this matter and they all ruled that Vince Foster committed suicide.

COLUMBO: Oh, I’m not questioning the investigations. I’m sure Mr. Foster died just the way they said but there are still a few loose ends.

CLINTON: Such as?

COLUMBO: Such as the autopsy X-rays.

CLINTON: What about the X-rays?

COLUMBO: Dr. James Beyer, the Deputy Medical Examiner for Northern Virginia, conducted the autopsy but no X-rays were taken.

CLINTON: No X-rays were taken? That’s absurd! They must have been taken in a case of this importance.

COLUMBO: Dr. Beyer checked off a box on the autopsy report stating that he took X-rays yet he later claimed the X-ray machine was inoperable.

CLINTON: Aren’t you forgetting the suicide note that Foster left behind?

COLUMBO (slaps forehead with his hand): That’s right! The suicide note! Obviously it must have been suicide if Foster left behind a suicide note.

(Clinton looks cheerful again.)

CLINTON: I guess that closes the case then.

COLUMBO: It sure does! Mr. President, you don’t know how relieved this makes me feel. I’m sorry to have taken up your time with this matter.

CLINTON: Think nothing of it.

(Columbo leaves through the door and Clinton returns to his desk. A few moments later the door opens again and Columbo leans just inside the doorway.)

COLUMBO: Uhh, there’s just one little point that I overlooked.

CLINTON (looking irritated): What is it, Lieutenant Columbo?

COLUMBO: How do we know that the suicide note was actually written by Mr. Foster?

CLINTON: The suicide note’s handwriting was analyzed and judged to be authentic.

COLUMBO: Yes, by a Capitol police sergeant who only studied handwriting as a hobby. The fact of the matter is that three renowned handwriting experts including Reginald Alton of Oxford University determined that the note, supposedly written by Mr. Foster, was an obvious forgery.

CLINTON: Lieutenant Columbo, are you one of those conspiracy kooks? The autopsy report, even without the X-rays, proved it was a suicide.

(Columbo reaches inside his raincoat and pulls out a couple of sheets of paper.)

COLUMBO: The strange thing is that the official finding says it was a mouth to head wound yet take a look at the report of the Fairfax County Medical Examiner, Dr. Haut. It came from the National Archives and was placed on the Internet from where I downloaded it.

(Columbo hands the papers to Clinton.)

Clinton: Hmm...It says that the wound was “mouth-head” just like the official report.

COLUMBO: Yes but look at the word “head.” It’s obvious that was typed in after another word just to its left was whited out. Then if you look on the second page of Haut’s report it actually says the wounds were “mouth to neck.” I submit, sir, that the first page was altered to change the wound location.

CLINTON: The bottom line is that, despite these discrepancies, the investigators have determined that Vince Foster committed suicide in Fort Marcy Park.

COLUMBO: Oh, sir. I’m not disputing their expertise. It’s just that professional police officers are trained to treat every death as a homicide until suicide is proven. In this case, however, Cheryl Braun, the senior Park Police Officer testified that they determined that Foster had committed suicide before they had even inspected the body.

CLINTON: This is all very interesting theory but the fact is that the Foster case has been ruled a suicide...Case closed.

COLUMBO: I’m sure you’re right about that. After all, if those in authority say it was a suicide then it must be so. Well, good day, Mr. President. Sorry for troubling you about details that must have some logical explanation.

CLINTON: Thank you for visiting, Lieutenant Columbo, and goodbye.

(Columbo leaves the room. Clinton returns to his desk and begins writing on some papers. A little while later we see Columbo looking from the outside into the Oval Office through a window just behind Clinton. Columbo begins tapping on the window. At first Clinton doesn’t hear him. Then he turns around and opens the window.)

CLINTON: Columbo! What is your problem?

(Columbo bends over and then stands back up again holding his shoes.)

COLUMBO: See all that dirt on the soles of my shoes?

CLINTON: Okay, they’re dirty. So what?

COLUMBO: It’s just like when my cousin Guido visits me. He likes working in my yard which is great but my wife throws a fit when Guido tries to walk into the house because of all the dirt on his shoes.

CLINTON: Will you please get to the point, Columbo!

COLUMBO: Well, the FBI scraped Mr. Foster’s shoes thoroughly but found no traces of soil. Everybody else who walked in the area of Fort Marcy Park where Foster was found came away with lots of dirt on their shoes.

CLINTON: You’re wrong, Columbo. A forensic expert found soil on Foster’s shoes.

COLUMBO: Oh yes. Henry Lee thought he found microscopic quantities of the soil on the shoes long after the FBI carefully went over them. Lee was the same fellow who determined that OJ Simpson must have been innocent because he thought he saw another footprint which never existed at the murder scene. Somehow I don’t think Mr. Lee is the most reliable expert in this regard.

CLINTON: Are you trying to say that Foster did not commit suicide in Fort Marcy Park?

COLUMBO: I think that could be a distinct possibility, sir. I’m sure that you, having been a friend of Mr. Foster, would want to leave no stone unturned to get to the bottom of this matter.

CLINTON: Just what do you expect me to do?

COLUMBO: It would be helpful if you could make the videotape from the White House parking lot surveillance camera available. We need to see Mr. Foster entering his car on the day he died.

CLINTON: That tape is missing from the White House vault where it was stored.

COLUMBO: Then how about the videotape from the vault surveillance camera? Maybe we can find out who removed the parking lot video from the vault.

CLINTON: The vault video is missing too. Perhaps the parking lot camera never caught Foster entering his car?

COLUMBO: At the most guarded building in the world? Not likely. As a matter of fact I’m sure that cameras are watching me right now and that Secret Service guards should be apprehending me at any moment.

(Suddenly several uniformed guards grab Columbo and haul him away.)

COLUMBO (shouting from the distance): This has been a really enlightening conversation, Mr. President! I hope we can pick up where we left off in the near future!

(Clinton slams the window shut.)


13 posted on 01/13/2013 8:25:45 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: IbJensen

Even before 9/11 that was true.


14 posted on 01/13/2013 8:26:15 AM PST by Lonesome in Massachussets (Obama: Brought to you by the letter "O" and the number 16 trillion.)
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To: oh8eleven

By 1944, the Japanese had no real hope of “victory”, their only hope was that the U.S. would give up trying. For the individual soldier, whether American or Japanese, it made little difference, since the Japanese fought ferociously and tenaciously, in either case. What the Japanese were trying to do was inflict as many casualties on the Americans as possible, without any hope of prevailing in any particular battle.


15 posted on 01/13/2013 8:39:33 AM PST by Lonesome in Massachussets (Obama: Brought to you by the letter "O" and the number 16 trillion.)
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To: oh8eleven

“...the only way to stop them is to kill them...”

Agreed, 100%! All of them.


16 posted on 01/13/2013 8:51:14 AM PST by Carriage Hill (AR-15s are the 21st Century's Muskets. Self-defense is the First Human Right.)
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets

BS. All you did was re-state what I refuted.


17 posted on 01/13/2013 8:51:52 AM PST by oh8eleven (RVN '67-'68)
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets
.....He was five and she was six
They rode on horses made of sticks
He wore black and she wore white
She would always win the fight

Bang bang she shot him down
Bang bang he hit the ground
Bang bang that awful sound
Bang bang Vince Foster hit the ground.

Mansions, limos, seasons blurr,
Slick porked his girls and he porked her
Yet she would always laugh and say
Remember when we used to play

Bang bang I shot you down
Bang bang you hit the ground
Bang bang that awful sound
Bang bang Vince Foster hit the ground....

Power, money, intrigue and
the one day trips to Switzerland
Unlaundered money in a bag
So heavy that it made him sag

and then that final, fateful day,
he knew too much, and heard her say

Bang Bang.......

18 posted on 01/13/2013 9:38:39 AM PST by varmintman
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To: BenLurkin

I guess we will never know what really happend to Vince Foster, but I am pretty sure we all know that he was transported to Ft. Marcy already dead, by person or persons unknown. More than likely Secret Service personnel.


19 posted on 01/13/2013 9:44:48 AM PST by Venturer
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To: Lonesome in Massachussets

Same as with islamic clerics who live long lives while they send the younger generations out to do their dirty work.

Vince’s gun magically changed color from the one Mrs. Foster said he had to the one he had his thumb in at the end. Magic bullets, magic guns and now magic elections.


20 posted on 01/13/2013 10:14:51 AM PST by bgill (We've passed the point of no return. Welcome to Al Amerika.)
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