Sloshed: How to Drink Before Noon

New York Magazine ^ | 9/26/12

[KarlInOhio]

You could just take some non-ADA approved advice from Kesha and brush your teeth with a bottle of Jack.

[KarlInOhio]

Oops. Forgot the cartoon to go with it.

http://xkcd.com/846/

[MichiganCheese]

You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning

[backwoods-engineer]

Not drinking in the morning goes back at least 2000 years. On Pentecost, 49 days after the Resurrection, Peter and the disciples were accused of being drunk (Acts 2). Not so, Peter said, for it is only 9 in the morning (the 3rd hour by Jewish time reckoning).

[razorback-bert]

BEER the breakfast of champions.

[Fiji Hill]

Some years ago, I was having breakfast with a friend at his grandmother's home. He decided to spice up our coffee with some rum, and took a bottle of Bacardi from the cupboard.

However, we noticed that the bottle was shaped differently from the Bacardi bottles found in the stores.Then I noticed that the label contained a Havana, Cuba address. Exploring further, I noticed that the bottle was dated 1953. Despite its age, the rum tasted fine.

[massgopguy]

BC football games that start at Noon are call for Bloody Mary’s at 10:00. Oh and then there’s the Orangejuice Rockefellers.

[sushiman]

Never too early for a glass or a lass .

[svcw]

Yep, cocktails were developed specifically for mornings.
We (USA) have become so alcohol paranoid to be idiotic.

[null and void]

LISTER enters, yawning, and goes over to the food machine.

DISPENSER: Good morning. How can I help you?
LISTER: Bonjourno. Um, give me breakfast.
DISPENSER: What would you like?
LISTER: Uh ... chicken vindaloo ... and a milkshake.
DISPENSER: What flavour milkshake?
LISTER: Um ... beer.

The dispenser produces a food container and a glass of some brownish liquid.

(If it exists, there is a Red Dwarf of it)...

[Nifster]

yup alcoholics always like to justify their consumption...

[P.O.E.]

Every once in a great while I treat myself to a half-shot of Seagrams in my coffee.

[rawcatslyentist]

Most of the 1800's Europe woke to a glass of absinthe, had another at lunch, and two around 7, the green hour.

They had to outlaw it because the whole continent was addicted.

[NEMDF]

I don't know. I watched my mother, her parents, my ex-husband all die young from alcoholism. I worry about whether my children will be susceptible. Call me paranoid.

[YHAOS]

Do a Red Skelton:
Announce you never drink before 5pm.
Look at your wrist (watch optional).
Declare it must be 5pm somewhere.
no problem.

[tx_eggman]

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake. - W. C. Fields

[goseminoles]

Noon games suck at FSU.. hammered by noon. Asleep by 6:00..

[Ransomed]

Hey, it’s always 5:00 somewhere

FReegards

[penelopesire]

I indulged in an am drink once a year on Thanksgiving morning after breakfast when I start cooking the feast.....lol!! Always make Bloody Mary’s!!