Posted on 07/29/2012 5:51:06 PM PDT by Lazamataz
Long ago I made a rule to never loan something that I might need back. You can still help but avoid the risk.
Nightmare is the proper word. Five days of sheer terror. Loss of a great Federal contractor job (immediately, if you are accused of a felony you lose the job THEN), and if a conviction occured -- which my attorney said would be hard to beat, because the judge instructs the jury: "Read the contract. Who's name is on it? Was the car returned? No? Guilty." -- if a conviction occured, try and get a computer programming job with a felony. Not gonna happen.
I've been in recovery for 11 years now and have seen a lot of this happen. But there have been some true miracles, so don't fail to help another addict.
God's will, not mine.
Yes. If they are active, the next hit is all they care about. I have a friend who rents to alcoholics and addicts (3/4 house). He says the tough ones to get to leave are the alchys. The addicts, he slips them 50 or 75 to scram and they are gone. That next hit is very important to the active addict.
Glad you got through that one, Laz. I keep my program friends at arm’s length. A sponsor once asked me to meet up with someone with $200 as a “huge favor” to him. On top of the booze he had gambling issues. He never brought it up again and seemed to harbor no ill will for my refusal.
I wasn’t referring to the action of renting a car. I meant don’t change your inner nature of being a helpful and generous person.
Sorry you’ve had to go through this ordeal, but by sharing your experience, you have taught us all a valuable lesson. Thank you for the schooling.
Who is that?!?
I will help another addict.
I will not put my name, my legal risk, and my cosign behind ANYONE, addict or not.
I would loan money to someone in the program, but I would do so with no expectation to be repaid, and limit the amount accordingly.
I enjoy your posts, but loaning out a rental car car is insane!
You may be a brilliant web and code designer, but consult me before you make any other business decisions. I'm rather good at it.
They say it's better to be lucky than good, but I like going with a bit of both. Very smooth getting the car back.
Thanks for the story. Sometimes I think I screwed up moving so far away, then I'll hear something like what you wrote and it clears my head and snaps me back to reality.
It had nothing to do with co-signing. It had to do with character evaluation. And while “trusting no one” sounds nice on paper, it makes for a pretty shitty world. So, human beings take risks on their hearts. And learn.
Karma can be a real bitch. If you were a user, it’s pretty likely you stomped on some hearts - hard. I’d say, while shooting rubber bands at the slowly rotating ceiling fan, smoking a cigar and sipping scotch, that that’s probably your reflection point here. Who’d you hurt - and how badly?
You got scared - but you were given the inspiration of how to save your skinny butt, just in the nick of time. That’s Grace.
You can’t give up on people, because if you do, you’re giving up on yourself.
On the other hand, holding most of them in an electrified pen under 24 hour armed guard on a barge in the middle of the Atlantic isn’t such a bad idea, either.
Congratulations on going straight - and welcome back to the challenge of being human.
Can I borrow your car?
/johnny
Wow. The alcoholics are complacent and sedentary? I guess that is where “beer bellies” come from.
I guess in some cases paying the junkies to go away is more effective but if they know where you live they would probably keep coming back, wouldn’t they?
We’ve been feeding a homeless cat and it just sort of sticks around. I bet it would stick around for a while after we stop feeding it, and become really noisy too.
I hope the people who help and minister to these people know enough to keep themselves safe.
Ignorance is bliss -- knowing about the theft charges would have made it much more of a nightmare for me.
The best part of your story is that you're still clean! It's all that really matters.
A lot of people in recovery from drugs and alcohol also need to go to Al-anon. That’s where I learned to detach from the qualifier but also be compassionate and supportive without enabling him or being taken in. Very important skills.
Your Honor, I concede the point.
I enjoy your posts, but loaning out a rental car car is insane!
I had the mistaken impression that the extended insurance covers it when you loan out the rental car. I heard of cases of that, but on further inspection, it's for immediate spouses and coworkers (on business related travel).
Yeah. The company makes a demand for return (usually by certified letter), in my case it was verbal and in front of the officer..... and 5 days later, if it's not there, you get Theft by Conversion. Felony for the amounts we are talking. Your ignorance wouldn't have stopped the charge.
I made it just under the five day window.
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